So many of us get married and things move along until one day we realize that we are no longer happy with our spouse. Maybe it is because we have grown apart or maybe it is because we have chosen different paths in our lives.
We produce children, sit at the same dinner table, sleep in the same bed, use the same bathroom. We know each other’s positive and negative traits and habits and we ignore the things that we do not like about each other.
Then comes the day we make the move to separate from our spouse because more likely than not we have met someone else. We are very attracted to the other person and we are sexually attracted to them.
We think about kissing them and having sex with them and we do not think about a permanent relationship with them. What we do not think about is how the other person is going to want more from us.
They are going to want that commitment and they expect a commitment over time. We dont want to commit because in our heart of hearts we know that we are only having fun and experiencing dating.
Some of us married our high school sweetheart and thought they were the only one we would ever want to be with and then we discover that we no longer want to be with them.
We want excitement and that giddy feeling from new love but we do not want to be tied down and raise another family. We enjoy ourselves until the pressure is applied to commit again.
We sit back and weigh out going back to our spouse or moving forward with our new love. We find more often than not that we prefer going back and trying to salvage our relationship.
Our spouse is comfortable and predictable and we have a level of trust with them that we do not have with our current relationship. We know our spouse and what to expect and what not to expect.
We go home and try to repair the damaged relationship and some go home and stay home but are not happy. Others go home and try damn hard to make it work but realize that you can never go home again.
Once you leave the marriage bed for another you do damage that is unrepairable. Yes, your spouse may take you back but it will never be the same and they will never feel the same about you or you about them.
Once home we cut off all ties to anyone we are attracted to or spent time romping in the bed with. We cut off all communication with anyone we are attracted to even if it is only an online friendship that has gone no further.
One cannot work on a relationship with distractions so we go it alone and focus on what was once our perfect fit or so we thought. It is a rare person that can forget that their spouse left them for another woman or man.
Knowing that you were dumped for someone 10 yrs younger is a real ego killer and no you will never be fully forgiven for that dirty deed. If you are religious you have to live with what you have done and infidelity is not easy to live with.
I dated a married man long before I married, I was very young and expected him to leave his wife and child to be with me. That was ignorant on my part but when you are young you think you have everything the older man would want.
Tight, young ass, plenty of sex is not fulfilling for any man and yes sex does get boring after time. It takes a very experienced, mature woman who can keep the bedroom exciting and there is not a single younger woman who can do that.
What we fail to realize is even though our spouse is trying to make the marriage work they will never forget that infidelity, they will never forget that betrayal and they will never forget that you made them feel less than desirable.
If you think your relationship will ever recover you are sadly mistaken. Your spouse may forgive you long enough to try to rebuild the relationship with you but it will never be the same and everyone I have talked to in this situation has told me the same thing. The relationship could not be saved as there was just too much hurt to recover from.