The minute people fall in love they become liars.
I hope you realize that life is short and happiness is limited when we do not enjoy sharing with our significant other. You try damn hard to give the impression that you are complete with the wife but the truth is you are not.
You can either continue to fake your smiles or you can do something to make yourself feel what you so miss. Maybe one day you will want to meet and break bread and just chat.
I seek no commitment just a few laughs and share my thoughts with another adult. But, the truth be known you are scared to death of me because I may call you out and put you on the defensive. Dont worry, I have no desire to hurt you or humiliate you so live your truth dear………
“When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.”
We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.
We all wear masks, and the time comes when we cannot remove them without removing some of our own skin.
There is a sacredness in tears. They are not a mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition and of unspeakable love.
Man must evolve for all human conflict a method which rejects revenge, aggression and retaliation. The foundation of such a method is love.
A family is a place where minds come in contact with one another. If these minds love one another the home will be as beautiful as a flower garden. But if these minds get out of harmony with one another it is like a storm that plays havoc with the garden.
He sat in the ski lodge looking through the window past the falling snow. He enjoyed the time with his family but he hated the trade off for his own happiness. He wanted to do family vacations but he didn’t really want to be with his wife.
She did everything she could to make him happy, happy to be back in her bed, in her arms but the truth was he wasnt happy at all. Sure he was smiling in all of the pictures but he had learned long ago to make a fake smile ring so true.
Of course like most men that married, divorced/separated and got back together with their spouses it just wasn’t the same and never would be. He tried damn hard to make things work with his wife but it was all so superficial and he knew it but he didn’t think his wife did.
Little did he know that his wife loved having her family back together but even in her deepest thoughts she knew the marriage was dead long ago. They attended all of the family get togethers and both of them pretended to be beyond happy.
It was all a fisod and they both knew it but it was better to pretend that they were happy. The kids saw through their parents false provodo but the parents thought they had fooled their boys.
The parents werent aware of what the boys had been up to but being from a wealthy family afforded them their choice of drugs and yes the boys were dabbling in different forms of sex, drugs and alcohol.
Even their youngest was doing things he shouldn’t have been doing and not just drugs. His parents thought he was so innocent but the truth was he was just an average kid with access to things only the well to do can touch.
His oldest had bipolar disorder which made it difficult to have a close relationship with him but he tried over and over. He had setup his children so they never had to work hard in life.
Just like all parents he wanted to give his children everything within reason but he also wanted them to learn while they earned. He wanted his family to be happy and he wanted to be happy himself but that would never happen as long as he faked it until he could make it.
The thoughts reeled through his mind but the one thought that would never leave his mind was “her”. He couldn’t help but read and reread her words as they touched him as if she knew him better than he knew himself.
He sat back and her image floated throgh his mind and he was getting aroused by the thought of her walking up to him and kneel in front of him. Her blue eyes told a story that was unexpected and he cold actually feel her take his cock out of his pants and slowly envelope it with her luscious lips.
His wife popped into his mind and he instantly lost his hardon. His wife would never give him the sexal pleasure that he so needed. She was a standard missionary woman that had no interest in exploring the world of sex.
sure he fucked his wife but it was nothing more than a quick release. His arousel came from his thinking of “her” and “her” alone. Every sexal fantasy he had ever had involved her and his wife was nothing more than a stand in.
The kids knew it was just a matter of time before their parents parted ways for good and of course they would always stand behind their mom. Theres nothing worse for boys then to see their mothers cry or hurting and their father had done just that to their mother and they didnt appreciate it one bit.
He on the other hand knew that the divorce had been very painful for everyone in his family included the extended family members. He knew he couldn’t continue to live this way and one day, yes one day soon he was finally going to grow some balls and meet the woman that controlled his fantasies.
His fantasies were always so vivid and colorful and his desire to touch her face was overwhelming. He wanted to touch her cheek and gently kiss her lips as his hands roamed down her her neck and across her chest.
His imagination took flight and he could feel her hands pushing on his chest as he fell into the chair. She slowly unbuttoned her shirt as she stood before him and her breasts wanted to spring free from the cloth that was nothing more than a sheer barrier between his chest and hers.
He admired her confidence as he watched her let her breasts free and unencumbered. She bent over his face and let a nipple brush against his cheek and as he tried to catch the nipple in his mouth she would stand up.
He so enjoyed the teasing and he really enjoyed himself knowing that he would soon enough bury his face into her the V of her very being. He could imagine how her very essence would be intoxicating and the thought made his cock rock hard.
To be continued
Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all of the darkness.
And loss of control is always the source of fear. It is also, however, always the source of change.