When my husband had his leg amputated it was a whirlwind of emotions and changes. My husband had a pain in his leg which lead to a hospital visit which lead to a lazy Dr. not taking care of his patient but instead took care of his golf handicap.
Because of a Dr.s neglect the double aneurysm behind my husbands knee didn’t get diagnosed in time to stop gangrene from taking over his foot. One would think gangrene is the skin turning a shade of green but it isn’t. The tissue dies and turns black and has a terribly repulsive odor.
The Dr. finally showed up and examined my husband’s leg. The Dr. came up to me and told me he was going to have to amputate my husband’s foot. He acted like he was asking if I would care for a cup of coffee.
My mind went into overdrive and out of control emotionally. I didn’t trust this Dr. who didn’t care enough about his patients to come in off of the golf course to check on them. I told him I wanted a second opinion and that I wanted him transferred to another hospital.
He nonchalantly agreed, like he had a choice-NOT. He said once I got the second opinion that my husband would be transferred back and the Dr. would amputate his foot. This Dr. didn’t give a shit that he was about to change the life of not just a man but his family as well.
My husbands employer had filed bankruptcy and another company was in the process of purchasing the business. The new company was under no obligation to hire any of the displaced employees.
They offered my husband a position after the amputation, that’s if he could return to work within 90 days. This was going to be impossible so my husband lost his job of 43 yrs. Being a main boss in the business he lost his “power”, his benefits, his pension was reduced to 1/5 of what he was entitled to and his long term disability he had paid for for all of those years was now gone.
Rewind to the second hospital opinion which was unbelievably worse than the first Dr.s diagnosis. The second Dr.s opinion was at that point he was unable to save the foot let alone the leg and my husband’s life.
The Dr. ordered my husband’s system to be flooded with the most potent antibiotics so hopefully the gangrene would be limited to the foot area. My husband went into the hospital on April 27th and by May 10th his leg had been amputated and he was transferred to a local hospital for two weeks of therapy and his first fitting for his prosthetic.
I brought him home and put him in bed, gave him his pain meds and went to the living room and sat down. I sat back and closed my eyes trying to make sense of everything that happened when all of a sudden my husband screamed out in pain.
He was having “phantom pains” which is when the body sends signals to the mind relaying that the body is feeling pain. It doesn’t matter if his leg was gone his body was still feeling pain or so it thought.
I knew he was devastated at his losses, not only physically but mentally and financially as well. I knew he felt like he was nothing but a burden and that he had no desire to live. I knew he was feeling all of this yet I couldn’t grasp how deep his pain was.
He had been home a week and I decided that it was important to literally get back on the horse and have sex immediately. It took some work on my part but I was able to make him hard enough for me to ride him.
We both had an orgasm which was needed by both of us and it confirmed to him that he was still capable of getting an erect penis. He was capable of having sex, not like he used to but at least he could still have sex.
“I choose my friends for their good looks, my acquaintances for their good characters, and my enemies for their intellects. A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies.”
“Originality is nothing but judicious imitation.”
She was in a melancholy mood as her past decided that Easter sunday would be the day that she would once again walk down memory lane. She decided that a bubble bath would relax her and possibly giver her the escape she so badly needed.
Walking into the bathroom she looked forward to the smell of the green bubble bath, Vitabath. The smell alone reminded her of her long gone aunt who she had been extremely close to before Legionnaires disease took her to meet her maker.
Her aunt had given her a bottle of Vitabath many years ago and the aroma was so pleasing to her. She turned on the hot water and then the cold to make the water temperature acceptable to her touch.
She squirted several shots of the bubble bath into the hot water and she stood watching the bubbles appear. Stepping back she placed one hand on the tie of her robe and untied it and pushed it off her shoulders.
She then placed the robe on the granite counter top in the bathroom and then she removed her shirt, sports bra and then her panties. She only wore panties when she took her dogs for a walk and there was no rhyme or reason for it.
She slowly put one toe into the water to be sure it wasn’t to hot and then she stepped into the bubble rich water. Slowly sitting down and leaning back in her jacuzzi bathtub made memories flood her brain like storm waters overflowing a sewer drain.
As she looked up into the recessed lighting memories of dead bees came back to her. The memory came as a reminder of some of the things her husband had done when he was alive. The bees had made their way into the attic area above the bathroom and her husband had climbed the roof to find the entrance that bees had found their way into their home.
He sealed up the entrance and the remaining bees died and fell into the lense of the recessed lighting. Her mind flooded with memories and the next thought was of the day she brought her husband home from the hospital.
She had been forced into making literally a life or death decision regarding her husband. She had to decide if she would allow the Dr. to remove her husband’s foot or have him transferred to another hospital for a second decision.
The Dr. told her the news, which seemed to get worse than the information from the first Dr.not only did the Dr. tell her he wasn’t able to safe the foot let alone her husband’s leg but he would do the best he could.
She watched her husband wheeled into the operating room and the doom that came over her was suffocating. She had no idea if her husband would live let alone have any part of his leg. Hours past and the Dr. came out to tell her that her husband had survived the surgery and that the Dr. was able to safe the leg above the knee joint.
This was great news as the knee joint made it so much easier to learn to walk with a prosthetic. She sat in the tub and slid down under the water in an attempt to drown out the memories but they continued to flood her brain.
She remembered the day she brought her husband home and she remembered the solemn mood that both of them were in. He had no idea the decisions she had to make in an effort to keep him alive and he would never know the heart wrenching decisions that she had made.
She was able to escape from the memories long enough to wash her hair and body and shave the parts that were in need. She then turned on the jets and positioned herself so the jets would shoot water through the opening in her upper thighs.
The water rushed through and like every other time she had a very fast and satisfying orgasm. Once the spasms stopped she let the water out of the tub as she stood up and dried her body.
She glanced through the bathroom door and for a reason she could not fathom, the wood floor in her bedroom brought her back to the day her husband came home. She could literally see herself lifting her husband’s frail body and putting him in their bed. The pain that shot through her body was ignored until she had him safely in the bed.
Little had she known that she had ruptured two discs in her lower back while she lifted her husband. She didn’t care about herself as much as she did about the man before her, the man that she would never know.
The loss of his leg was like a cancer that ate away at their lives together. Even though they didnt marry for love they cared deeply about each other. It broke her heart to see before her a broken man, a man that would never be the same by a long shot.
This Easter Sunday was like every other Easter Sunday since she had married as Easter was only a few weeks from her husband’s birthday and ten days later the eminent death of a man taken control of by leukemia.
She usually made a ham for Easter and a lovely dinner but not this year, no this year would be vastly different. Her only daughter was doing an internship in Washington D. C. with the attorney general’s office and her son was a picky eater. She had decided to make no dinner for the two of them and instead chose to eat a frozen meal of swedish meatballs and noodles.
She preferred cooking to going out to eat or to eat frozen food items but just in case she got sick and couldn’t cook for herself she had several frozen meals in the freezer. The sadness that comes with memories of those long gone overshadowed every other emotion she had.
She had lost everyone she had ever known her as a child and the man that she created children with. She didn’t feel sorry for herself, just a sense of loss so deep and so controlling she had no idea how to crawl out of the depths of the memories.
She so needed someone to wrap their arms around her and give her some comfort but there was no one in her life that could give her what she needed. She missed sex like crazy and she missed the smell of a man, the feel of his body, the feel of an erect penis pushing against her lower back in the early hours of the morning.
She missed so much but she knew when the time was right the man that was to be part of her remaining years would walk into her life. She knew that both of them had something special to offer each other but until that day she would walk by herself and walk down memory lane while she nursed a part of her that was filled with loss and one day found.
He woke up one day and found himself to be a very famous young man. He had dated his wife since he was a young teen and his dreams always included her. They married and moved to another country because of his talent.
He was unlike the typical man in so many ways but he was also as typical as many men. He wanted to have children and especially a daughter. He produced four sons but he would never produce the daughter that he so wanted.
As the years past by him, he and his wife grew apart and even though they both loved their children, money had afforded them the ability to send their children to boarding school. His wife loved to dance and opened her own dancing school as well as chased her dreams as a clothing designer.
Little did she know that she was no designer and because of her husband’s fame doors opened for her. Finally, their marriage took a crash landing that she barely survived but she did end up finding her way once again.
He loved the feel of freedom and he so enjoyed all of the random sex he had without worrying about a controlling wife in the background. He traveled extensively and he tasted many women from around the world.
He dated famous women as well as the non famous and he learned more about sex than he had ever experienced. He was a kinky fucker in many ways but he had yet to meet that one woman that would challenge him mentally, teach him sexually and take him back to a carefree life.
During the boring years of his faltering marriage he spent many hours on the internet watching porn and flirting with ladies on dating sites. To his surprise he found a woman that was very sexual as well as sensual and he found himself returning to chat with her over and over.
As the years past this one lady was always in the back of his mind and he could never completely shut her out. He found himself intimidated by her because she was so unlike all of the other ladies he had spent time with.
He was used to buying anything and anybody but this woman he could never buy at any price and that made her so much more desirable to him. He wanted to be with her so bad and he wanted to know if she really was the one woman that he had waited for his adult life.
He was aware that she wasn’t young and she wasn’t thin like so many of the ladies he had laid. He knew she was a strong, independent woman that would turn and walk away without a second thought.
He so feared rejection and he had been taught early in life that men were to be the controllers in the world. His wife was somewhat timid and she always felt inferior to the other women her husband worked with. She wasn’t pretty like the others and she felt that her husband was more attracted to other women.
The truth was he loved his wife and never had any thoughts of cheating on her until the latter years of their marriage. Now that he was divorced and had played the field for the last year he found himself quite a lonely man.
He wanted more than strange and random sex, he wanted a partner, a friend, a lover. He wanted the woman that would allow him to be himself and keep him stimulated sexually as well as mentally.
Deep down he knew the woman but he was to afraid of her rejection to move forward. She sat back and knew all of this but she was unable to do anything about it. She knew one day they would meet and on that day both of them would see their worlds change for the better.
She was ten minutes early for their meeting and this gave her the advantage to pick where they would sit in the restaurant. She walked slowly yet methodically toward the booth in the furthest corner.
She slipped into the booth and ordered a coke as she sat and waited for him to meet her. She was someone that got annoyed by those that set appointments and were late and she didnt tolerate waiting.
He walked through the door and she instantly could tell he had a feminine side that he kept hidden from the world. It was something tacit between the two of them as he didnt have to tell her about his secret desires.
He could tell immediately that she knew his deepest, darkest secret and he felt that she also knew he was wearing panties and a bra under his clothing. He had this desire to have breasts and had even gone as far as to take hormones so he had “little girl” breasts.
He was a tall and very thin man which made it easy to find ladies clothing that fit him. He also got so physically excited when his cute little nipples were tortured and his breasts flogged.
He had no desire to be a woman full time and his cock still got hard when he got excited. His only desire was to have someone play with him in a private and safe environment. This appointment would hopefully turn out in his favor and she would do a session with him.
She greeted him in a warm and friendly manner and she was very good at communicating with others. She made him feel accepted and comfortable and he felt that he could let down his guard and show her who he really was.
They chatted and she told him a bit about herself and he confided in her about his secrets, which of course she already knew about. She had had so many sessions that she had learned so much from and reading peoples “dirty little secrets” was child’s play to her.
She never insulted or made fun of any of her clients because like them, she had her own dirty little secrets. Her kids knew she was a pro domme as well as her sub but her neighbors and friends had no idea.
To look at her one would never know that she had a closet full of black leather outfits and thigh high boots. No one would ever guess that her basement was her private dungeon with a closet full of toys as well as a spanking bench, stockade, sybian and other furniture that was used in her sessions.
She was the only pro domme in her area that had top of the line equipment as well as her own dungeon. She had a website that was obviously filled with pictures of her sessions but she never showed the faces of her clients.
When people visited her site they read the warnings she had posted about meeting anyone at a motel or hotel. She put warnings out for those that did decide to meet someone at a hotel and how to protect themselves.
She was more concerned with the safety of a person than the money she made from sessions and people could tell that she was no scammer. There were so many young girls using bdsm as a way to scam people.They would put a price on their services only to accept so much less as the money was all they truly cared about.
A real domme never compromises on her set prices and this domme was no different. She was a pro and she would walk away from doing a session rather than settle for less than her pricing. Her clients knew how much her sessions were before they met and yes she had several who tried to get her to take less but they failed.
She spoke with her sissy cross dresser and she had him follower her to her dungeon. She let him into the dungeon and ordered him to remove his clothing. She showed him the restroom and told him he could change into his feminine clothing.
It only took him a short time to put on his sissy bra, panties, sweater, skirt and high heels. She complimented him on high long legs and like any sissy that made him feel fantastic.
She put the wrist cuffs on him and hooked each wrist to the eye hooks in the ceiling and then she put the spreader bar between his legs and hooked each end around her ankles. Once in bondage the domme put clothes pins on the sissy’s nipples and then she put on miniature clothes pins.
The pain was so enjoyable but the sissy wanted to feel more pain so the domme put the pads of a tens unit on each nipple and his balls. She then took the violet wand and on the lowest setting touched each nipple and the sissy’s balls.
As she increased the intensity of the sissy’s cock responded with an up and down movement. When the cock gets excited it will do a twitching movement and that is what this sissy’s cock was doing.
For the remainder of the session the domme slowly increased the intensity of the tens unit as well as the violet wand. Finally, the alarm went off letting both of them know that their session had come to an end.
The sissy went into the restroom and changed back into his male clothing and once she was back into the dungeon play area she thanked the domme. She gave the domme payment for the session and also gave her a very nice tip.
This sissy had found the perfect place to feed her fetish and she knew that she would be back to see this domme. The next visit she would request that the domme giver her the release she so badly wanted during her first visit but had made it clear she didnt want release at the first visit.
The sissy thanked the domme and the domme walked the sissy to the door and gave her the standard good bye hug. The domme was a warm and friendly person to everyone and that included her clients. She told the sissy to feel free to contact her again for another session and she would schedule her and the sissy left as graciously as she had entered the dungeon earlier.
She had been contacted by so many slaves, they didn’t even bother to give a proper introduction, they just sent her emails asking her to take them as her slave. Of course all of them said the same thing.
They promised to do whatever the Mistress ordered yet they had no experience as a true slave as the lack of branding proved that. So many wanna be slaves and wanna be real time mistresses were online looking for a hook up of one type or another but most were financially motivated.
The slaves were looking for a lover as well as the mistresses and the submissives had fallen into the same category. To many people couldn’t find love in the vanilla world so they reached out into the bdsm world. These foolish individuals threw caution to the wind in hopes that they would be loved and not used, which of course was plain bullshit.
The mistress was out on a lovely Saturday afternoon running errands and doing a bit of shopping. To look at her you would never know that she was a mistress in the world of bdsm and she never announced it to anyone.
She happened to be some new black leather outfits and the sales representative was happy to help her. He was interesting enough to have a conversation with and as he handed her different outfits to try on he got the nerve to address her as mistress.
She smiled at him and asked him how did he know she was a mistress and he responded “by the excellent choice of garmets mistress.”
The conversation starting out quite innocently and lead from one topic to another. He asked her if she was in need of a slave and she asked him if he was offering to fill that spot. He of course said yes and she just laughed and asked him what were his qualifications.
He said that he three years of being a slave but his mistress had been in a terrible accident which left her in the care of a nursing facility. Without having a mistress to serve he said that he was and lost. She told him that so many wanted to be her slave but none of them were real slaves. He said “mistress if you allow me I will show you my SLR number.
The mistress was truly impressed as she had never met a single slave that had a SLR number. He told her he would gladly hand over all of the ownership documentation that would prove that she owned him, that’s if she would accept him.
Together, they picked out several outfits that suited her quite well and looked awesome on her. He had excellent taste in womens attire and he had been trained quite well by his last mistress.
He always stood to her side slightly behind her and he only addressed her when she asked for him to respond. He asked her if he could take her to lunch as his break was starting in a few minutes.
They agreed on a nice local restaurant that afforded them privacy which they wanted so they could continue their conversation. He asked for permission to address her and she have him permission to do so
He asked if she would care to see his SLRN and she said yes. He turned around and faced the front of the restaurant so no one would see what he was doing. He lifted up the back of his shirt just enough to pull down his belted pants a few inches.
Just below his pant line was a tattoo that showed is slave number. He told her that she could confirm the number on the TSR as he was a registered slave. She believed him but she had learned long ago never to trust anyone’s word as she had turned into a “show me or blow me” type of person.
She went online to the TSR and looked up his number and just as he said he was registered. She ordered him to tuck his shirt back in and to set down. They chatted and ordered a lovely lunch and to her surprise he was well versed regarding food.
He had ordered some homemade pasta with truffles and tossed in truffle oil. That was an appetizer they both enjoyed tremendously as they spoke of his service to her. He went down the list of his skills and the things he had done for his mistress.
He made it clear he would do what was asked of him and he would go above and beyond her wishes if she would take him on. They finished their lunch with an agreement that he would come by her home after he finished his day job.
He showed up at her home on time and he entered her home with the demeanor of a true slave. He stood before her and waited for her to give him orders that he would happily follow. She introduced him to her sub and she ordered him to remove his clothing.
He stood before her naked, totally shaved from the neck down and he was in very good physical shape. She asked him to turn around so she could show her sub what a real slave was. The slave was quite impressed with the tattoo and asked the mistress if he could could show the proof of a true sub to the slave.
She then looked at her sub and ordered him to get naked, of course he was to remove each piece of clothing and fold it neatly and place it on the empty chair to his left.
He did as ordered and then said to the slave “ I admire your tattoo but I think my pierced balls have a much nicer appearance as the cuffs are made of white gold and a gift from mistress.
The slave smiled as told the sub that he thought the handcuffs were very nice and quit fitting for a sub. He then turned to his new mistress with his head bowed waiting for further orders. The mistress told him to sit on the ottoman and she then had her sub stand in front of the slave.
She then ordered the slave to suck the cock of the sub and massage his balls as he did so. She was quite entertained by the willingness of the slave as well as the moans and groans that escaped her sub. Just before he was ready to cum she ordered the slave to stop and then she had the sub turn around and bend over.
The sub was then ordered to lick the subs asshole and stroke his cock at the same time. As the sub bent over she ordered him to fondle the cock of the slave. It was the perfect “circle jerk” in many ways and both of them were extremely excited which she could tell by the hardness of both of their cocks.
She ordered them to communicate with one another on when they were ready to cum as she had ordered them to cum at the same time. Both of them began moaning and asking if each other were ready to unload their load and as they both said yes, the mistress allowed them to shoot their cum on the floor.
Once both had came she ordered the slave to clean up the floor and the sub was to follow her into the bathroom. She ordered the sub to fill the tub and once filled to get into it and relax while he waited for the slave. She ordered her slave to wash her sub and once done he was to shower. Once washed and dried the sub was ordered to go to bed and to relax and the slave was ordered into the cage under her bed that had stayed empty for many years.
You like the music she chooses, you like the tempo and you wish you could sway with her naked body next to yours. She has a taste in music that feeds your own musical hunger and you wish you could talk to her about it.
You follow her online and you read everything she writes in hopes that you will be brought closer to her just by reading her thoughts. You have realized that no matter how far or how wide you travel you just cannot find that one woman that will fill her shoes.
There is something so alluring about this lady and you just cannot turn and walk away. You must read and reread every word she writes and you wonder how much of what she writes is fantasy? how much reality?
You wish you could smell her hair after she has taken a shower and you wish you could touch her skin and feel how soft she feels. You want to touch her body in seductive ways and you want her to seduce you in all of your glory.
This woman is what a real woman surely is and she can fulfill every fantasy that you have ever thought about. She can also fulfill every fantasy you have yet to even begin to think about.
You wonder what her lips would feel like on yours and you wonder how her hands would feel roaming your body. You so wish you could be with her and let her shove you up against the wall and tear at your clothing.
You want to feel her hands on your stiff cock and you want to feel her rub your balls as she strokes you into ecstasy. This woman has power like no other woman and the fascination you hold for her is so controlling.
He had thought about his sexually motivated fantasies for ever so long. His wife no longer had any sexual interest in him and he refused to “force” her to have a sexual relationship with him.
He did enjoy the feeling of satin panties against his cock and balls and the feeling of ladies stockings was also so arousing to him. He decided to look online and see if he could find a domme that would play with him without being a danger to him.
So many domme’s online didn’t have their own play space and they played at hotels or motels. This wasn’t a safe way to play as it wasn’t only not safe it also was not considered private.
Most of the so called domme’s online were girls in their twenties looking to make a quick buck without producing the results their clients really wanted. He had read the ads and gone through them and finally found a domme that interested him.
She was his age, mature and experienced along with having her own play space which was private and safe. He set up an appointment with her and they met at the local restaurant where they shared a meal. They discussed what his fantasies where and what she was willing to do for him.
He followed her back to her place and just like he said when describing his fantasy, she had made sure there was a nice array of her panties and stockings for him to try on. He wanted her to “catch” him putting on her delicate items and then tell him what she was going to do to him and his little clitty.
She put the wrist cuffs on him and hooked him to the eyelets in the ceiling while she put the spreader between his ankles. He stood before her in her panties and stockings and she knew he enjoyed cbt so she pulled out the violet wand.
She teased his balls and asshole with the violet wand and then she decided to put the tens unit to work on his balls. The sensation of the violet wand and the tens unit was quite invigorating.
She pulled the panties down to his knees and then she ordered him to turn around and she shoved a plug up his ass. She then put the prostate attachment on the magic wand and she pulled out the plug and replaced it with the magic wand attachment.
She turned it on low and slowly increased the power and the more his prostate got massaged the more excited he became. He would move his ass faster and faster as the massager hit that one spot that was so fucking hot.
He loved the feeling and his cock began to get hard as he pictured himself cumming with the wand up his ass. She took him to the edge of orgasm and then she removed the massager.
She then placed the hummingbird attachment to the wand and once she placed the latex gloves upon her hands she squirted some lubricant into the palm of her hand and warmed it up.
She then took his cock in her hand and stroked him in an attempt to make him harder so he would easily come when the hummingbird was put in place. The magic wand was a wonderful way to get a quick orgasm as no man could last more than thirty seconds.
She turned on the wand and slowly increased the speed of it until she could hear his soft groans and moans. She quickened the speed and the next thing she knew he was having the orgasm that he so desired.
She removed the wand and took the toys that she had used on him over to the sink where she washed them and disinfected them with bleach. She then let the warm water flow over the wash cloth and she walked over to him and wiped his ass, balls and cock until they were clean.
She then dried him and removed the wrist cuffs as well as the spreader bar. He was a happy man for sure and the orgasm was so intense it knocked him on his ass and he was ready for a nap.
She hugged him as she did with all of her clients and she wished him a safe trip home and told him to think about their session. She wanted him to contact her later and tell her how she could improve his next session. She always wanted her clients to experience their desires and she wanted to give them what they so wished for.
“We must be willing to get rid of the life we planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.”
A weak man has doubts before a decision, a strong man has them afterwards.
“Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future.”
She new it was going to be a hectic day as her mind wondered to teaching her guards that she was serious and focused. Her uniforms were washed and ironed by the prisoners and they always made sure that the right amount of starch was ironed into the uniform.
She removed her night gown and put on the crisp grey uniform top and then she slipped on the matching grey skirt. She had numerous metals for her bravery during the war and she wore them proudly.
She brushed her teeth and put her hair in a tight bun that actually pulled her skin back from her face. She had a wicked grin on her face as she thought about those that she would punish severely.
She left the safety of her apartment and headed to her office and she expected her guards to be dressed in uniform and to be waiting in line for her approval. She was always driven by her own chauffeur and he knew what was behind this woman.
She wasn’t a cruel or hateful woman but she was firm in discipline and she demanded the utmost respect. He saw her gentle nature come out when she was taking her dogs out for a ride in the country.
He was the only one that ever got a glimpse of her gentle side an but he also knew how mean she could be. She gave sadist a new meaning, a richer, deeper meaning that went past the bone to the marrow.
She had one guard that didnt realize how dangerous it could be to steal from the warden and she crossed that line. She had gone into the wardens office when the secretary was away and the warden was doing rounds.
The warden had a beautiful brooch she had received from a dear friend years ago. The brooch meant so much to the warden. The warden would hold it in the palm of her hand daily and draw strength from it.
The guard had admired the brooch for as long as she worked at the camp and she couldn’t help but be seduced by its beauty. She sneaked into the wardens office and she picked up the brooch. She could feel the strength coming from it and she wrapped her fingers around it as she exited the office quickly.
She assumed no one would know who took the brooch and she felt safe and satisfied that no one would point a finger at her. She went about her daily duties and she even walked passed the warden several times during the day.
The end of the work day neared and all of the guards put their batons and handcuffs in their lockers. They chatted with each other as they headed towards to the exit gate and none of them expected what was yet to come.
The warden stood at the end of the hall by the exit gate and as her guards came into site she straightened her top and got ready for the interrogation of the group. She ordered them to line up with their hands by their sides and feet together.
She had them stand an arms length away from each other so she could walk around them during the inspection. None of them knew that the warden had e.s.p. and yes she knew things before they happened.
To get them off guard and to be relaxed the warden started her inspection by telling the guards that she appreciated all of their hard work. She went on to tell them that she was going to award three of them with gift certificates to show her appreciation.
As she told them about the certificates and the criteria she followed to pick the winners she walked up and down the line of guards. She looked at each one intently without their knowledge.
She told them that one of the criteria was honesty and the importance of being honest with the world around them as well as to themselves. She told them that honesty was a display of character and without honesty they had nothing.
She then asked them if they would turn in their friend or work associate if they knew that they had stolen something. She watched their faces as some of them looked puzzled, some looked as if they were trying to decide and some of them looked confident in their reply.
She walked the line of guards and asked each and everyone how they would respond to the question. She felt the nervousness of the guards as she worked her way down the line. She watched them as some shifted back and fourth, some bit their fingernails and one in particular was slightly sweating.
She stood before them and announced the three winners and had them leave the line and stand in front of her. She thanked them for their commitment to her and handed them the gift cards. As they looked at the value of the gift card they were quite shocked to see the amount on the card.
She demanded dedication from her guards and she excused the three winners. She then went to the end of the line and told them that she believed in rewarding dedication and punishing those that were not totally dedicated to her.
As she walked the line of guards she handed them an envelope to show them that they were appreciated as well. They also were surprised to receive what they thought to be a thank you card.
She told every other guard to turn around and open the envelope, they could look at what was in it but not remove it. The guards looked inside their envelope and they were surprised at the amount on the gift card they received as it was unexpected.
All of them them received a gift card except one and her envelope had a smaller envelope inside it. She then ordered them all to face her and she asked each and everyone of them what would they do to discipline a thief.
Some said cut off the hand of the thief, some said tar and feather the thief, some said to use a ruler on the palms of the thief’s hands and some said strip the guilty one naked and use her body any way they felt to.
She ordered the thief to stand next to her and to open her envelope. The guard did as she was ordered and she pulled out the smaller envelope. The warden ordered her to open the smaller envelope.
The expression on her face told the remainder guards that she was in serious trouble. She took out the card and it said only one word. The warden ordered her to turn the card around and show her fellow guards.
They looked at the card and all of the gasped at the shock of what they read. The card said THIEF in large, bold red letters. The guard holding the card felt the embarrassment rise to her face which she knew was red by now.
She ordered the guard to follow her to a new piece of punishment equipment that the warden had specially made. She had the other guards follow her as well and to stand and watch. She walked up to the guilty one and walked up to her and unbuttoned the top two buttons of her shirt.
She them grabbed the shirt and pulled it open as the buttons flew everywhere. She then ripped off the matching skirt and the guard stood in front of everyone in panties and a bra. She walked up to the guard and patted her on the ass as she used her other hand to go into the front of the bra.
Inside of the bra she found her beloved brooch and took it out. She showed it to the other guards and all of them sucked in their breath. They knew how important that brooch was to the warden.
They couldn’t believe one of their own would steal from the warden and especially steal something so important. The brooch was made of diamonds, rubies and emeralds and it was a very expensive piece of jewelry.
The warden didnt care about the financial value because that meant nothing to her. The brooch held someone more valuable than money could buy. The brooch was given to her by her dieing best friend when she was on her death bed.
She truly believed that the brooch had powers that protected her and surrounded her with angels. Her best friend had told her to hold the brooch everyday and she would feel the presence of her best friend.
She shook off the thoughts of memory lane and she cut off the bra of the guard and tossed it aside. She then ripped off the panties and through them aside as well leaving the guard naked.
She then put handcuffs on her wrists and ankles and she made sure the spreader bar had her legs spread quite a distant apart. She then put nipple clamps on her and blindfolded her.
She then pulled out her tens unit and attached the pads on her labias and on each side of her asshole. She then whispered in her ear “I hate thieves and liars and you will beg or mercy.”
She then turned on the tens unit and she could tell the guard was uncomfortable. She planned on making the guard real uncomfortable at best.She increased the intensity which made the guard squirm.
She then increased to the maximum strength and the guard begged for mercy, just as the warden had told her she would. She left the tens unit on and used the violet wand on her nipples.
By the time she was done with the guard the guard was crying and filled with shame. The warden undid the cuffs and removed the spreader bar and the tens unit pads. She asked the guard did she have anything to say. The guard told her she was sorry and would never steal from her again and pleaded for mercy.The warden ordered her to leave her site and she had two guards escort her out. She was forced to leave the prison naked and cold.
The guards could feel the embarrassment the guard had felt and they also felt her shame as well. The warden had been easy on her in the other guards opinion but none of the would ever think of stealing from the warden.
The remainder of the week was quiet and the guards did their jobs to the utmost of perfection. Even the prisoners felt something had happened that was strange and unusual.
The warden went home for the weekend and she had been dealing with several prisoners that she had thrown in the hole. Their behavior was unacceptable and she had to decide how to teach them a lesson they would never forget.
She thought about it all weekend and when she returned to the prison on Monday her first order of business was dealing with the several undesirables. She ordered them to be brought to her office and to wait outside her office.
They were all macho men or so they thought and the warden decided to take away some of that macho bullshit. She had a spare room attached to her office and inside she had a prisoner standing behind a video cam.
Her cam was set up to interrupt any program showing in the recreation area. Most of the prisoners would be watching tv to pass their time. None of them were ready for what they would be seeing shortly.
The warden chuckled to herself and she was getting great pleasure out of knowing how humiliated the asshole prisoners would be. Her spare room had a large selection of whips, chains and bad things.
She had the prisoners follow her into her spare room telling them to get prepared.She removed the handcuffs from one of the prisoners but she left on the ankle shackles. She ordered the other prisoner to remove his shirt.
They were being video taped and she had ordered the video photographer to flip the switch so everyone could watch on the tv. Those watching tv already were trying to figure out what they were watching.
They had been watching the basketball game but now before them was several of the prisoners. These prisoners were feared by all in the prison and the watchers didnt know what to expect.
The warden ordered the prisoner to rip off the shirt and take down the pants of the prisoner. She ordered him to remove his shoes, sox and underwear which he did with much hesitation.
She walked up to the prisoner removing the clothing and put a blindfold over his eyes. She then had all three of them follow her to the spanking bench. She put the one prisoner in the stockade and had him position himself on the spanking bench.
The one prisoner that was standing naked was ordered to stand in front of the stockade. The third prisoner was ordered to get naked and to stand behind the spanking bench. The prisoner on the spanking bench was the leader of the bad asses in the prison.
The badass was going to find out how much of a badass the warden was. She had total control over these three and they would learn to behave themselves. The other prisoners sat and watched the show and had no problem heckling.
They found it funny that such macho guys were being forced to perform bisexual acts that were yet to come. The video photographer had been ordered to film up close any oral or anal actions.
She ordered the one behind the spanking bench to lube up the asshole of the one on the bench. He refused to do as he was told so the warden touched his balls with a cattle prod.The pain shot through him and the next time he was ordered to do something he did it.
He lubed up the asshole and he was given a large plug to shove into the asshole, which of course he did. He was then ordered to walk to the front of the bench and stroke the other prisoners cock until he was good and hard.
The prisoner felt so embarrassed and then he was ordered to stroke the cock of the other one. Both of them stood at the front of the spanking bench stroking each other as the entire prison watched.
They couldn’t help but get hard and the one in the stockade was ordered to open his mouth. He refused so the warden put the cattle prod to his balls which made him open his mouth wide.
The other prisoner positioned himself in front of the stockade and the other prisoner was ordered to guide the hard cock into the open mouth. He was ordered to suck the cock while the other one was ordered to lick the balls.
After some time the one prisoner came in the open mouth and the other one had stroked his hardness until he was milked dry. The open mouth was ordered to drink every drop of cum and lick the cock clean.
He did as he was told and the other prisoner was told to stand behind the spanking bench. He did as he was told and the other guard was ordered to suck the limp cock until it was hard.
He refused and the warden took out her bull whip and whipped the prisoner until he begged her to stop. He told her he would suck the cock if only she would stop with the cattle prod as well.
He dropped down onto his knees and sucked the cock until it was good and hard. Then she ordered the plug removed from the asshole and the hard cock to take its place. She ordered him to drive his cock deep into the asshole.
The lube would help the cock to slide in but the size of the cock and the length would be painful. He grabbed the ass cheeks after positioning his cock into the opening of the asshole. He then drove his hard cock into the asshole driving it further and further in with each thrust.
The one getting fucked cried out in pain and kept saying no over and over while being filmed. The entire prison started clapping and stamping their feet in delight to see such a macho asshole be taught a lesson.
The warden left the three of them and she told them she would return in time. She returned with a tray of fruit and cheese and she walked to the front of the spanking bench and grabbed the hair of Mr. Macho.
She had a strawberry in her hand and she told him to open wide for the berry, which he did. His mouth was very dry from his outcries and the berry was nice and juicy and felt good in his mouth.
She walked over to the container that had all of the sybian attachments and she chose the dildo that was about 2 1/2″ in diameter.She showed it to the macho man and she told him that he would be sitting on the dildo in short time.
He wasnt prepared for such a large toy up his ass but the warden didnt care as she had all of the bullshit she was going to take from him. She ordered one of the other prisoners to undo the straps on his legs, middle and arms.
He was rude and a real smart ass and the warden wasn’t going to tolerate his abusive behavior. She had the video photographer set up the cam to get an up close and personal video of the rude asshole riding the biggest dick he had ever seen.
She put handcuffs on him and placed his arms over a pole that was about five feet long. She had it pushed up against the back of his neck and he couldnt move his arms once he had been handcuffed to the pole.
She had the other two inmates stand on each side of the macho man and she had them force him down on his knees. The sybian was moved into position and the two inmates were ordered to pull his cheeks apart.
They did as they were told because they didnt want to me the next ones to have the dildo rip their asshole apart. The warden walked up to the macho man and she pushed him back onto the dildo.
Inch by inch she forced him down until the dildo was all the way up his ass. He had been begging her to stop but she refused to give in an inch. She then forced part of a banana into his mouth and she said to him “enjoy the ride” as she began to turn the knob on the sybian.
The sybian not only went back and forth it also rotated and the warden would increase both the speed and the circular motion. It was not in the least an enjoyable experience for the rider but the entire prison was enjoying the show.
She then ordered the other two inmates to get on their knees, she ordered one to get move behind the other one and to push him down on all fours. She then ordered the one to lube up the ass of the other one.
Once lubed she ordered the one to put his cock in the ass of the other while macho man watched. She ordered the fucking to be a real fucking with deep penetration and thrust after thrust.
The video that was being made would be a great source of humiliation for years to come. The warden moved the tv that was on a rolling tv table in front of the macho man and she removed the cover over the screen.
To the macho man’s deep humiliation and embarrassment he saw not only himself but also the other two inmates. The warden asked him how he enjoyed being a popular actor and if he thought his career would take off.
The warden let out a devious laugh and then she slapped the macho man across the face. She had punished the three of them for two days and nights and they were totally exhausted and beyond humiliated.
The warden finally ordered them to get dressed and to return to the cell block. She told them if she had any trouble from them she would make the next visit to her playroom much more painful and embarrasing.
Illusion is needed to disguise the emptiness within.
|“The most authentic thing about us is our capacity to create, to overcome, to endure, to transform, to love and to be greater than our suffering.”|
Confession is always weakness. The grave soul keeps its own secrets, and takes its own punishment in silence.
If passion drives you, let reason hold the reins.
“The universe doesn’t like secrets. It conspires to reveal the truth, to lead you to it.”
“I am not concerned that you have fallen- I am concerned that you arise”
“No man’s level of intelligence should be measured by the color of his skin, his words shall always lead him above those that judge him harshly.” Kimberly
The greatest good you can do for another is not just to share your riches but to reveal to him his own.
He had planned a trip to visit his mistress for quite some time. The weather was great for travel and his wife was out of town for several days. He had spoken to his mistress daily and he always thought about what they would do as far as playing.
His mistress had been extremely busy with school as she had returned to college to keep busy and keep her mind sharp. She had two temporary ischemic attacks which affected her short term memory.
She thought about her sub and she was always concerned about his health but she had difficulty remembering dates and times of important appointments. When she first told her sub about the memory loss he wasn’t so sure she was being honest with him.
He did some research and found it true about short term memory loss as a possible side affect of a t.i.a. His mistress hated the memory loss and she always felt like a failure when she would forget something important like her subs dr. appointment.
The sub could buy her beautiful gifts of candy, flowers, diamonds and he would take her out to dinner and to a show. He also enjoyed going to the local bdsm public parties and he watched over his mistress like a hawk over its babies.
The mistress wanted to do something special for her sub so she planned on making him a lovely homemade dinner with desert. This was something that no one could ever put a price tag on as it was a heart felt gesture.
She was also planning on sending her son out for several hours so she could play with her sub. She was hoping that her sub brought the stand for her stockade as she had planned on using the stockade during their play time.
She was planning on positioning her sub on the spanking bench so she had easy access to his ass. She was planning on giving him a good spanking and then she was going to take his virgin ass with a strapon.
Her sub had purchased a small strapon cock that would slide up his ass perfectly without pain. He watched her with anticipation as she changed the cock she had in her strapon to the smaller one.
This is something he had wanted to try for a very long time but he was always afraid it would be extremely painful. His mistress would never hurt him and he knew that but in the back of his mind the fear hung on.
She grabbed the bottle of lubricant and lubed up his ass as well as the strapon and she positioned herself behind him. She slipped the strapon into his ass ever so slowly and she took her sweet time in inserting the entire cock into his ass.
She had rendered her sub helpless as she had him strapped down to the spanking bench and she had put a blindfold on him as well. He was left at her mercy and he was enjoying himself so much.
She grabbed his hips and she slowly worked the strapon in and out of his tight ass until he was loosened up. She then began to fuck him deep and quickened her pace and her sub was so enjoying the experience.
She took a break from his ass and attached a parachute to his cock and added weights. The pulling down on his balls would make his orgasm so much more intense than anything he had ever felt.
She turned back to his ass and his cock and balls were fitting nicely through the hole on the spanking bench. She had added quite a few weights to the parachute and he could feel the pulling which felt quite exciting.
As she slipped the cock back into his ass and fucked him good his cock got rock hard and he could feel an orgasm building. She kept thrusting into his ass and finally a rush of an immense orgasm took over his body.
His entire body shook with the strongest orgasm he had ever felt and his mistress kept fucking his ass until he was left with nothing to expel. She undid the straps and removed the blindfold and took her sub to her jacuzzi bathtub.
She ran the hot water and the bubble bath and she sat on the toilet as her sub stepped into the tub. She took the loofah and soaped it up and washed her sub and then she washed his hair.
She rinsed him off and then helped him out of the tub and dried him off. She then lead her sub to her bed and had him slip under the covers for a well needed nap. He was used to running all day but today he would allow himself to fall into a wonderfully relaxing nap. He closed his eyes and drifted off into a dream which mirrored his playtime earlier that day.
“People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that’s what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.
A true soul mate is probably the most important person you’ll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake.Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you.
A soul mates purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life, then introduce you to your spiritual master…”
“If you can make a woman laugh, you can make her do anything.”
“Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.”
“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage.”
We accomplish so much in our lifetime and some of us have accomplished great things. Being famous for writing a book, being an excellent sports player, drawing and painting wonderful art is not accomplishing much in this life of ours but so many thing so.
Fame comes to so few and what have they learned from it? How to be self absorbed? How to be arrogant fucks? How to be selfish bastards? Yes, yes and yes to all three and many more undesirable traits or acts.
I look in the mirror and I wonder who am I? I was once someone’s wife, someone’s employee, someone’s friend, someone’s lover. Of those things I am proud of none but I am proud of being a mother to my children.
I have had a damn hard life and my kids have watched me struggle and hopefully they have learned the hard lessons of life by watching me. I am a strong woman who wishes she werent so strong as strength has kept me alone.
It was a lazy day as we were recovering from a night of serious sexual intercourse. We had toys, oils, food, camera and vids we were recording. It was a naughty night of adult play with lots of passion. He had never experienced anyone like her before, her touch so gentle it gave him goosebumps but felt so good.
She was invigorating, extremely honest, sassy, sarcastic yet she was also funny and wild in a fun way as well as smart, this woman was extremely intelligent. She was so gentle and he could feel the love right through her hands as she massaged him with warm scented oils and a room full of wonderfully fragrant candles. They got up and showered together as they did almost every day.
They did their morning ritual and as she stood there brushing her teeth, she could hear him peeing and she wondered if he was writing his name, don’t guys do that when they get bored? lol, he flushed and washed his hands, this is something he learned early on with all of his traveling.
She was listening to sting and brushing my teeth to the beat as he just looked at me and shook his head and smiled. He seemed to always be smiling and she constantly tickled him. They were only together several times a month and he had only seen her three times and he was comfortable taking a piss in her presence.
This felt odd to him to be so attracted to a woman he would never have pictured himself with. This woman had more bad luck than anyone he had ever known and she pulled on his heart-strings like something he had never experienced. He couldn’t sleep at times or think straight because of her.
Last night was the first time that they had been physical and the fit was like a hand and glove. He felt as if he had met her before and moments of dejavu what flash before him. He knew this woman from somewhere, he could read her mind, he knew when she was going to go right and he would go left, he remembered her favorite tea, he knew she like wild flowers and he couldn’t believe she was so simple.
She didn’t have a bit of pretension within her and she was just a delight to be around. She would talk endlessly about something was bothering her until she felt she had resolved the issue. She worked hard and she played harder and when it came to being open and free she certainly was.
This woman was fun, really fun and romantic, she was just such a turn on because she was erotic and he couldn’t wait for the evening to come as his time was so limited he treasured every second of her presence. He had to fly off to India and then Canada and then to France.
He was used to all the traveling but this woman made him crazy and he couldn’t wait to see her again, be with her again, touch her and make love to her again. Tonight he was going to teach her a thing or two and the thoughts going through his head totally distracted him from the paperwork before him.
She had a typical day of running errands, reading emails, filling orders and shopping for dinner. She wanted him to come home to a stellar dinner and afterwards relax and have some wine and talk. The one thing about her that attracted him to her is when she would ask how his day was she actually listened.
He was having some difficulty with a situation and he was letting of steam at a pretty good clip and she stood there and listened intently until he was done. When he finally finished, he looked at her and she had a small smile on her face and she said hon why don’t you try this and she proceeded to share her idea.
He was flabbergasted that she had the perfect solution and he believed he was falling into serious love with her. Their plan for the day was he would do his business and she would do her usual and they would have a nice quiet dinner and relax. His day had drug on but it was finally over and he was walking in the door when the aroma hit him like a ton of bricks and he followed his nose.
She was in the kitchen cleaning up when he walked in and he asked her what she was cooking. She told him a standing rib roast with new potatoes and sweet baby carrots. She also had young white asparagus and sweet brussel spouts and rich creamy butter and a salad that had walnuts and pomegranate, chick peas, kale, vine ripe potatoes and romaine lettuce.
She had made a vinaigrette with olive oil and balsamic vinegar and spices. The roast was in the oven almost done and the chocolate Torte was in the fridge. He grabbed a soda out of the fridge and couldn’t help but take a swipe of the chocolate cake.
She had made a six layer chocolate tort that was to die for. She filled the layers with rich ganache and the frosting was the original buttercream made with egg whites and creamy butter. This woman knocked his sox off and he was not letting her get away. He walked over to her and she took a bite of carrot and said “what’s up doc?” as he got closer to her she put her hand on his crotch and she could feel his erection.
He grew larger with each stroke and his balls were aching so much, he anxiously awaited the touch of her hand and as he kissed her she set him free. He removed his pants and ripped open her blouse and began to run his hands over her breasts and gently taking one nipple into his mouth.
She was running her fingers through his hair and she would tighten her hand which slightly pulled his hair but he didn’t mind. He actually got turned on by it because he was giving her pleasure, he was the man who was making her moan. He picked her up and sat her down on the granite counter and he leaned her back and he leaned over the counter on top of her.
“This is a nice kitchen” he said as he spread her legs and french kissed her while fingering her. She was moaning and talking dirty to him and then she told him what she wanted him to do to her. She was not shy in the least and he loved that about her. He kissed her breasts and played with her nipples and he kissed his way to the center of her being.
She was actually dripping wet and she had bent her knees so he could fit comfortably between her legs. He kissed, sucked and fingered as she begged him to make love to her. He inserted a finger into her as and had a dildo put into her hot body as he played with her clit. She started saying “o yes hon, that’s it, yes, please make love to me, I’m cummmmmminnnnnnnggggggggg”
The sound of her in the throws of an orgasm made his cock so hard he ached and he guided himself into and held onto her knees as he entered her inch by inch. She was so tight for her age and that felt so good to him and as he submerged his cock into the deep she would talk dirty to him which made him slightly crazy.
Once in he made two slow strokes and then he took off, he was in her as deep as he would go and he would slam in and out and then he came with a thunderous roar which knocked him practically out. The second he quit coming he grabbed a chair and sat down because the wave of dizziness was really something.
This woman was remarkable and so perfect in every way and he was afraid to lose her. He had never met anyone like this woman and she was so damn fascinating. She talked about losing her husband and never wanting to marry again and that scared him. He wanted her 24/7 and he didn’t want anyone else with her.
He was already jealous and this didn’t sit well with him at all and he had to stop thinking about her. She welcomed their time together but she seemed to like being alone too. It was starting out as a nice relationship because she never pressured him and when he had to cancel meeting her several times she understood and there was no bitching, he liked that.
She would miss him and he could tell by her voice and instead of saying I love you or I like you a lot she would say “ditto”. He loved looking her to her eyes and her smiled knocked him out. Where had she been his whole life? He was determined to make her want him so bad that when he did ask her to marry him she would scream yes.
She had ordered him to finish the stand for the stockade but he chose to do other things instead. She told him she would punish him if it wasn’t done by the weekend.
He drove two hours to visit her and she took him into her dungeon to teach him a lesson. She ordered him to remove his clothing and to bend over the spanking bench.
She strapped his legs, arms and his mid section. She placed the stockade in front of him and positioned his head and arms through the openings and then locked him in.
He had been bad and she needed to teach him a lesson and she started that lesson with a spanking. She spanked his ass with her hand then she started with various paddles, brushes, canes ect.
She placed a blind fold over his eyes and then she had her top stand in front of the stockade. She ordered her sub to open his mouth and the top slid his cock into her subs mouth.
He was ordered to suck the cock until the top came and as he sucked cock she put on her strap on. Walking around behind him she lubed up his ass and entered him with a finger, then two, then three.
After working his ass for quite some time and her top was close to cumming, she slid her strap on into the subs ass. She slowly fucked her sub and quickened her pace when the top shot his hot cum into her subs willing throat.
After the top was done she asked her sub if he had learned his lesson as far as keeping her pleased. He said “yes, my mistress, my queen” and she patted his red ass as she undid the straps.
She opened the stockade and removed his head and wrists and she cleaned the cum that had dripped onto his chin. She cleaned up his ass as well and told him never to displease her again.
I have always been a very sexual woman and my sex drive has always been over the top. So many women my age have no desire to engage in any type of sexual act.
We screw like rabbits when we are young, we produce our families and sex goes out the window for most. Women put their children before their husbands and that is the first step into the relationship grave.
Men try to stay committed but the desire to practice pro creation is to strong to deny. There is nothing more depressing then to meet someone that cannot sustain an erection upon will.
I have met so many men in their 50’s that cannot get an erection or keep one. Being so sexual the thought of giving a guy a blow job yet he cannot get hard is a real turn off.
I know someone who thinks “we belong together” but once again here is another man that cannot get an erection when he wants to. I understand that his age and medication have a lot to do with it but that doesn’t matter.
If you cannot please me sexually what good is it to take care of me financially? Money isn’t a top priority in my life but sex is and I need a man that can fulfill my sexual desires.
Is it wrong for me to feel this way? I do not believe it is and I also believe that two people that are not sexually compatible cannot have a healthy relationship.
There is nothing more attractive to me then a naked man with an erection. I so enjoy the body and seeing a man naked gets me going every time. The problem is I do not see many men that are relationship material that can sustain an erection.
When we find a great read or an author we admire we become addicted to reading their work. Addiction & fiction takes us places we wish we could visit in real time.
Then we have our stalkers, yes stalkers become addicted to following their prey and it is happening more and more online. The one good thing about an online stalker is he cannot physically hurt you.
An online stalker generally doesn’t reside close to you but can and yes they can become violent. The one that gets addicted to you online tends to live a very hollow life in many ways.
They may be poor or extremely wealthy but their lives are lacking in many ways. They are not getting what they need to be truly happy in this world and they get lost in the persons life that they follow.
It is really sad that this society as a whole lacks what it needs to be happy. People have been tricked into thinking that money will get them true love and happiness.
Materialism has become a way of life for many and yes at the moment that they purchase or receive an item they are happy or so they think. Happiness cannot be bought but can be obtained.
If we could turn back time we would find a much simpler life and a much fuller life. I so miss the family meals together, doing things as a family, being happy with a book or a conversation.
Unfortunately the world has changed so much that divorce is synonymous with marriage, men dating much younger women is a feel good, women become leaders in the work place and break down of the family unit has become standard.
To my stalker or stalkers, I welcome you with open arms to meet me face to face. I invite you into my life real time so I can show you what you are really missing and what you need.
It was Christmas Eve and she loved the smell of winter spice on the stove. Earlier that day she had cut up some lemons and oranges and added them to a pan of water which she had already put in cinnamon sticks, bay leaves and allspice.
She enjoyed cooking and was a 50’s woman through and through. She enjoyed baking and cooking from scratch and her children enjoyed the love she put into their food.
She finished wrapping the gifts and placing the bows on all of the presents and slid them under the tree. Khloe and Luna loved climbing the tree and playing hide and seek among the gifts.
The cats warmed her lonely heart and she so enjoyed watching her pets play and enjoy the holiday. She walked into her room and looked at the Christmas moon and thought of another time, another place.
She was a lonely woman but she would never succumb to the depression that comes with loneliness. She stood naked before the moon as if to offer herself as an offering.
He walked into the room very quietly and he admired her as she stood among the halo of the moon. He walked up behind her and slid his hands up her sides and over her breasts.
Kissing her neck as he fondled her nipples, his own erection became apparent as it attempted to push its way through his pants. He undid his zipper with one hand as the other hand played with each of her bare breasts.
He slipped off his shoes and let his pants fall to the floor and his boxer briefs followed. She turned and unbuttoned his shirt and slid it off his shoulders as they kissed a passionate kiss.
These two people were highly sexual and both had a kinky side that made their sex life always so damn hot and exciting. She kissed his neck and worked her way down his chest as she lowered herself on her knees.
He buried his hands in her hair and pulled her towards him as he made sure that his cock touched the back of her throat over and over. He was so aroused he couldn’t help himself as he shot hot cum down her willing throat.
She sucked him dry and massaged his balls as she licked every drop of his semen off of him. He raised her up and lead her to the bed and sat her down on the edge.
Slipping onto his knees he spread her legs and buried his face into her naked mound. He licked and sucked on her clit until she cried out with an orgasm that was followed by several more.
Both of them were sexually exhausted and crawled under the covers and snuggled. No words were needed as they both knew how much each meant to the other and how much they enjoyed their sexual compatibility.
She walked into the bathroom and turned on the shower as she thought about what she would wear. She dropped her robe and stepped into the shower enjoying the heat from the water.
She stepped back under the shower and let the water roll over her head and down over her breasts. She reached over and grabbed the bar of soap in the soap dish and let the water cover it.
Once she had lathered up the soap she slowly rubbed it into the wash cloth which would mold itself to the crevices of her body. She washed her face, neck, arms and chest as she thought of what was yet to come.
Washing her lower extremities including her female area of pleasure she then washed her legs and feet. She then raised on leg up onto the shower stool and reached as far back as possible as she ran the razor from her ass to her pubic area.
She hated pubic and ass hair and she kept those parts of her body as clean and smooth as possible. One thing she had learned using a strap on is you really need to shower daily and she could always tell when someone hadn’t showered before a session.
She hated the smell of dirty ass and there was no excuse for a grown man to smell of ass. The last strap on session made her change her website to remind those that enemas and showers were a requirement or she would stop the session immediately.
She finished her shower and dried off with the plush beige towel hanging on the warming rack. She wrapped her hair in the towel and slipped back into her grey robe.
She tied the belt on her robe as she exited the bathroom and she thought of the birthday present she had bought for her favorite sub. He had decided that he wanted to pierce his scrotum to show his devotion to her.
They had gone to a genital piercing business and he had purchased a bar bell and a pair of handcuffs as she had requested. He had gotten pierced and had the bar put in placed once he was pierced.
She had put the handcuffs on the bar later that evening when they were back at his hotel room. She refused to let anyone spend the night with her at her home. She did sessions in her private dungeon but her bed, well that was totally off limits to anyone she wasn’t physically involved with.
Doing a session more often than not involved her to bring her client to the point of release but that took like less than two minutes. Most men could not hold back an orgasm once they were with her.
She was very sexually talented in more ways than one and she knew how important sex was to a man. They literally came and went and most never could last the entire hour session.
She had sessions that lasted two and three hours but most were an hour session. She had given free sessions but they were far and few in between and only given for special occasions.
She walked over to her suit case which contained most of her bdsm clothing and some lingerie and she picked up the black faux leather bra and thong.
She then picked up a garter belt and stockings and she laid these items aside for the next day. Her sub had never seen her in anything but full dress but tomorrow she was going to let him see her in sexy clothing.
He had erectile dysfunction which could be attributed to the medication he was required to take daily. She never thought less of him and she felt frustrated that she couldn’t arouse him.
She knew that medical conditions could be controlled with medications but even medications sometimes could not change the situation. She was hoping that he would allow himself to explore the sybian he had purchased for her and she hoped that the prostrate stimulation would do the trick.
They planned on getting him pierced again as he had removed the bar before a medical examination and he couldn’t get it back in. She knew that the cheap handcuffs he had purchased would end up giving him a terrible infection.
She had ordered him to remove the handcuffs and give them to her and he did as he was instructed. She took them to a jeweler and had a pair of handcuffs cast out of white gold.
Her sub was like most men that had a kinky side and a spouse that didnt want any part of that side of them. They committed mental adultery but she never let it go past that.
She would never be sexually involved with her subs and she would always keep them from changing their relationship at home. She hated being a bitch but sometimes she had no choice to keep her sub in line.
Her sub had been very good to her and truth be known he had treated her better than any man had. He wanted her to have everything she needed to make her dungeon the best and he wanted her to live comfortably.
She was learning to accept his gifts without feeling that she had to reciprocate. He was such an aquarius male and she being a female scorpio they had such a connection.
They could read each others minds and they would end each others sentences. This is how the aquarius/scorpio always worked and yes both her kinky as fuck.
What she really wished for was a single aquarius male that was available to spend time with her and make her laugh. She wanted a man with a nice cock and who loved sex as she did.
She knew her mate was out there somewhere and she wished he would come to her. She so missed the touch of a male and sex was something she was starved for.
She believed strongly in connections and she knew that a higher power had control of these connections. She would continue to do what she had done for years and that would be to masturbate with a picture of him in her mind.
From the beginning of time patriarchy has been the way of life but so many men are prepared to step aside and let the woman take control. Men have always been known as the “leaders of the world” so to speak.
Men are able to put the thought of patriarchy aside and show their “delicate” side. Women confuse men when they want them to open up and expose their deepest of feelings, yet be the strong male.
I have no problem with a man being strong yet can sit down and tell me how he really feels. I am not one to deal with anyone that is over emotional and clingy and I know why men do not like clingy women.
No one wants to have to carry another emotionally when it becomes almost a daily thing. Men do not want a women that is always showing insecurities and do what they can to hang on to the man.
I embrace the male thought when it comes to the clingy women. I cannot handle a clingy man but hey if your pet dies, then cry. If you lose a best friend or sibling, cry yes cry as much as you need to.
I do not look down on men when they expose those emotions but if you constantly need reasurance that I will be there for you 24/7 and that I will agree with you 24/7 as well, well go fuck yourself because it won’t happen.
In today’s society men are under the gun all day and their professional persona is carefully molded. Men want the world to see them one way but their personal lives they need to show vulnerability.
A woman that expects a man to be their wall of security every minute of every day needs to check herself. Men do not want clingy, they do not want insecure.
Men like women that are strong and do not need directives. Men fear those women as well because they fear being persecuted for showing their emotions.
No man wants a women to look at him and think he’s a pussy for showing his emotions. Men just want to be respected by day and given freedom to hand over the reigns at night.
Most men enjoy being submissive after they punch the clock for the day. I am not saying they want to give up total control, but yes they like to give up the decision making for the most part.
I have the ability to “feel” when a man needs his space, when he needs to expose his feelings, when he needs to share sorrow, loneliness, emptiness and so many other emotions.
Women need to quit being so confusing to men and want them to be strong but bitch because they dont expose their emotions. In my world a man can be himself and be respected for being strong and submissive.
Do you ever sit back and let the the movie of your life run through your head? Do you ever get that warm and fuzzy feeling when you think back to a different time?
Do you ever wish life were like it once was and you had the worries of a child? Do you ever wish that you could feel that love you once had as a teenager?
Why must life be so full of strife at times? Is it the lessons of life that really make us stronger? So many questions with so few answers leaves me wondering how different my life could have been.
If I had done things differently where would I be today? Would I be happy and carefree? Would I have the greatest love of all in my life? The loneliness of my heart is clingy and this is so unwanted.
I see his face in my minds eye but does he see me in his? Is it wrong to care deeply for someone you have never met? Never spoke to face to face? Am I the fool of fools wearing the colored cap?
The film that flickers from one side of my mind to other runs in black and white as well as color. If I could cut out snippets would the picture show me where I could have been?
I wonder if there will ever be a time that I am so happy I cannot stop smiling. I wonder if those that read my words absorb them and feel how life has touched me, molded me.
I cannot change my past nor would I really want to but yes I wonder how my life could have been different. If I had only made one change in my life along the way, who knows where I would be today.
My pets keep me entertained daily and my daughter and I trade dialogue with them. The cats are always interesting as Luna especially refuses to let the bulbs on the Christmas tree stay on the tree.
She climbs up the center of the tree and when we yell at her to leave the bulbs alone she gives us that look that says “nope, not today bitch”.
Its so funny how we act like we are the voice of our pets and how we can make anything they do funny. The yorkies are no different and its so funny how they act after a bath.
Michael will bark and bark at Gabriel as if to say “come play you little dick”, lol. I am always referring to Gabriel as my little dick because he is so small.
He refuses to play with Michael after his bath and its funny because Michael tries like crazy to get Gabriel to play. Gabriel looks at Michael as if to say “listen you asshole, dont you know Im wet and cold???”.
If our pets could talk I am sure they would give us an ear full and keep us laughing. Khloe our other kitty, she is one horny bitch as we never got her fixed.
She rubs all over us and wants us to blow on her little coochie or pat it I do believe. She is stimulated constantly and wants to get breed as much as a new bride.
If you have pets I am sure you have wondered what they were thinking and what they would say if they could speak. They are so comical and affectionate and I actually prefer my pets to most people.
He had always enjoyed being a pony as he grew up and the feel of his sister’s girlfriend riding on his back was so erotic to him. He loved the thought of her riding him bare assed naked.
He new that she would never be naked or even partially dressed as she rode him but he really liked being treated like a pony. This was his secret fetish and he thought he was the only one that secretly enjoyed being treated like a pony.
He was tired of hiding his fetish and never being able to enjoy himself until he found a new mistress. This mistress ordered him to remove his clothing and stand naked before her.
She inspected every inch of his body before ordering him to put on the pair of pony points. She also had a bit and crop and yes she would ride him. She would not be naked but he got so hard just knowing that the warmth on his back was from her crotch.
She had placed the bit in his mouth and he felt the desire to prance through a field. He so loved ponies and horses and being treated one was damn exciting.
She rode him around her dungeon and used the crop on his ass to make him go faster. His new mistress ordered him to stand on his new pony points and she put a tail on him.
She put on a head dress and he looked right fitting as a beautiful pony should. She taught him how to prance properly and he made a wonderful pony for her.
She had flown both of them to California for a pony play parade and she had ordered a hand made cart. She attached him to the cart and he pulled her in the parade.
He was admired by many as his head dress blew in the wind and his tail tickled his ass. Every time his mistress pulled on the reigns the bit in his mouth would tighten against the sides of his mouth.
That made him feel even more like a pony and he really enjoyed seeing other pony boys and girls doing the same thing as he was. He would do whatever his mistress ordered him to do as he was her private pony.
She stood in front of the glass door and looked out over the land that lead up to her back porch. Naked and feeling a bit of a chill her nipples erect and wanting the warmth of a male mouth.
He walked up behind her and silently put his hands on her hips and moved them up the sides of her body. Finally, finding her full, ripe breasts he directed his fingers to those erect nipples.
He moved the hair on her neck with his chin and she could feel his hot breath as he began to kiss her and work his way up to her ear lobe. He slid his tongue into the crevice of her ear as he massaged her nipples.
She leaned back into his body only to find him clothed. This was a huge disappointment to her but she would change things rapidly. She turned around quickly which was unexpected.
She grabbed him by the shirt and kissed him long and deep. Ripping open his shirt, the buttons flew across the room. He had no desire to stop her as his cock throbbed with wanting to fill her.
She removed his belt and quickly undid his buttoned pants and unzipped them. Pulling them down as she lowered her body into a kneeling position made his cock jump with anticipation.
His huge cock hit under her chin as she positioned herself in front of him and licked the head of his cock. She massaged his balls and stroked him with her free hand as she took him into her mouth.
She took him inch by inch and the more she massaged his balls the deeper his moans. She then positioned herself so she could titty fuck his hardness.
He enjoyed watching her and he couldn’t stop the pre cum from dripping from his ready cock. She would occasionally bend her head down and lick his cock as she fucked him with her tits.
She pulled him down and he got on his knees she then pushed him back and slowly climbed up his body and positioned herself over his hardness. She made sure he watched as she lowered herself onto him and this made him even harder.
She rocked back and forth on him and the thrill was not lost on her. She couldn’t help but scream out as her orgasm shot through her body. Knowing what he was doing to her got him so excited he shot his hot cum into the area of her body that cradled his cock.
She fell to one side of him and they kissed passionately for quite some time. Then they chatted about how they would spend the day together enjoying each other.
Did you ever feel an emptiness that was outlined with loneliness and colored with a sadness? A very strange set of emotions to feel all at once but seem to explain that unsettling feeling.
The Christmas holiday is a very tough holiday for so many and I am no exception. Since Halloween, Christmas has been promoted and pushed, no shoved down the consumers throats.
The greed that the retailers have is nauseating at best and it kills the desire for me to engage in the holiday. Christmas used to be such a beautiful and exciting time but no longer does it hold anything for me.
The weather is in the 50’s and there will be no snow on the holiday. There are very few who have decorated their homes or businesses. Holiday shopping eludes me and I just feel blah.
I will be driving my daughter to Washington D.C. on the 18th of January which is the day after her 21st birthday. She has been accepted into the Washington Center program and she will be working for the Attorney General until May.
I will drive back myself which is about a nine hour drive and hopefully the weather will be on my side. This is a fantastic experience for her and yes I will miss my girl.
Christmas is just so empty for me and I really wish I could get into the spirit. My sub has given me some wonderful presents which were totally not expected.
He has tried so hard to fill the gaps in my life but he cannot. As my sub he will never be a romantic or sexual partner and that is what I miss so much. Its so awesome being in a relationship especially around the holidays as you can share so much.
I feel that I have to keep reminding him that our relationship will never cross over into something of a personal nature. I have this feeling that he wants so much more but is willing to wait.
He will be waiting forever if that is the case and I do not want to ever lead him to believe there will be more. I so badly need my own needs fulfilled but I cannot do much about that at this time.
When my soulmate is ready he will come to me and my heart will be open to him. I just keep praying, hoping and believing and yes he will appear when the time is right.
Relationships tend to run a smooth path when the individuals involved are getting on with each other. When you meet someone and you feel a connection then things tend to run smoothly.
When two people get angry words are spoken which can be harmful but then again those words can make one think as well. I refuse to let anyone degrade me or make me feel small because I dont go with their “flow”.
I dance to my own tune and I try to be considerate of others feelings. I tend to go along with most things until someone tries to force their will on me.
I refuse to let anyone tell me how to live my life and how to be a “better” mother. I have learned long ago to let people believe what they will but not to allow them to force that will upon me.
I raised my children the best way I have known and being a widow without any living family has made it very difficult at times. I have always treated my children in a mature manner and I have always been honest with them.
Some have told me that I was giving to much information to my children for their ages but I didn’t pay any attention to their opinion. I have found treating my children as young adults has taught them much.
They have watched me struggle damn hard and they take very little for granted. The best policy I have found is always be honest and answer questions honestly.
My sub and I had quite a rift the other evening but after both of us cooled down we were able to discuss the situation. It is nice to be able to discuss things and have a happy out come.
We have cleared up some grey areas and expectations and this has made our domme/sub relationship stronger. He knows there is no guarantee that tomorrow will be there for either of us.
I really do not enjoy having disagreements but they are mandatory for the growth of us as individuals as well as our relationships. I like it when I can talk about my feelings and clear up any disagreement.
I am finding that I must be more flexible to make my sub feel desired and cared for. I must remember that he is in a relationship he no longer enjoys but find it necessary to stay in.
I must also remember that I am not the easiest person to get on with and I can be quite over bearing at times. The thing I like about my sub is he makes me think about my actions and reactions and that makes me a better person.
Relationships are so fun and exciting but also can be a huge pain in the ass at the same time. Being a dominant, independent woman I have always relied on myself to get through life.
When I married, I slowly began to rely on my husband for different things and emotional fulfillment. When he passed away it was hard for me to be totally independent once again.
I have found being alone to be a very easy way to force one to rely only on themselves. When someone comes into your life and they try to tell you how to run your life then problems begin.
I resent anyone that does know me well or not at all telling me how to run my household and what I can and cannot allow. If you tell me that our relationship will seize if I do not change a situation in my home, well then pack your fucking bags.
I had a disagreement with my sub this week and he has been giving off quite the frost. He has been stepping back, no jumping back and re-evaluating everything he has done for me.
I tore him a new asshole and told him “how dare you tell me what I can and cannot allow in my home”. He has been counting the years, days, weeks and hours that he can be with me full time.
I told him when we began our domme/sub relationship that he was not allowed to change his current situation at home. He was informed that if he chose to change the relationship with his wife then I would be history.
I am not someone into destroying relationships and being his domme I must maintain the control of our domme/sub relationship. My sub has been peering into the shadows of his mind and not liking what he sees.
He has found someone that understands his fetishes and can feed them. He has found someone that shows him attention and affection and not in a romantic way. We can literally read each others thoughts and we get on quite well but that is as far as I will allow.
I made it clear that I did not want to get involved in a romantic relationship with him. I refuse to let a bdsm relationship turn into more than it should be. I do not believe that a bdsm/vanilla relationship can work for most people.
Being a domme isnt easy as it is up to me to keep my sub in line. By doing so I am basically forced to say and do things that make him reel in his emotions.
I do not wish to hurt his feelings but sometimes that is the only way you can guide a relationship back into safe waters. He mentioned how much money he has spent on me and the gifts he has given me.
I learned long ago never to expect anything in return when you give someone a gift. My sub wont cross the line by saying “look at what I have done for you or have given to you” but he doesnt have to now does he?
Once you mention what you have done for someone else even if you skirt around it you are still “reminding” them that you did things for them. This makes me quite uncomfortable because I went through that shit with my husband.
I have kept myself from letting others help me for just that reason as I hate being reminded they helped me. At this point I really do not know what will happen to my domme/sub relationship.
The one thing I am certain of is things happen for a reason. I know in my heart of hearts that people move out of our lives to make room for new people and I am ready for the next phase of my life, with or without my sub.
If my sub no longer wants to stay in this relationship then I will respect his decision. I will wish him well and be here for him as his friend and if he needs a mentor.
This is how relationships should end, with each person respecting the other and being there when they need someone, not on a daily basis but on occasion.
It seems like forever since I have let anyone into my heart and I still am not ready to move the latch for good. I am getting better at allowing people to touch me emotionally but to open up completely is just to scary for me.
I have no problem touching others especially physically but mentally I do try to connect with each and every person that crosses my path. Emotional connections are very powerful and can be very controlling and damaging.
I have to be careful with exposing my heart as I have been so severely burned in the past. I will one day be able to open up completely to another but all I can say is baby steps my dear, baby steps.
I have found that bdsm relationships are the strangest yet the most telling about people. The dominant submissive relationship has to be contained and strongly controlled as emotions can run high.
The submissive tends to have an emotional connection with the dominant that is comparable to a love relationship. It is not and never will be a relationship of real love but it feels that way to many submissives.
When you find someone that accepts your fetishes and helps you feed that part of your personality you tend to gravitate very strongly to that person. The dominant at times can forget their true place in the relationship as well.
When you allow the sub or the domme to cross the line of sharing their bodies sexually then you have a problem. It is so common in any relationship to have one that cares more or does more than the other.
This doesn’t make either one a greedy or selfish person it just one of the dynamics of any relationship. The dominant needs to always stay in control emotionally or the relationship will suffer.
The submissive is looking to be dominated but when the dominant allows their emotions to get out of control then the relationship will slowly crumble.
As the relationship breaks down its slowly subsides into a vanilla relationship. This has happened to many dominants and submissives and before they know it they have come full circle.
This is not what the submissive or dominant truly wants so both must be cautious not to let their feelings have free reign. You cannot plan to have a life with your dominant unless you are willing to keep the relationship in tact.
To many get emotionally involved and want to do everything they can to make their dominant happy. Purchasing expensive gifts is quite common and the submissive does expect reciprocation in one form or another.
This is a problem with people in both the bdsm and vanilla world. When you give a gift or do something for another it must be done without strings attached.
You should never do for another with the expectation of something in return. If you give, give from your heart and it will come back to you one day.
It seems that sex can be contributed to almost any situation or item. Even the alphabet speaks of the male as in alpha. The alphabet is so powerful but few really realize how powerful it truly is.
The alphabet consists of twenty six letters and within that twenty six letters is the capability to destroy a human being. It is the use of words that can bring down the fall of a country, a relationship, self esteem and so on.
It never seizes to amaze me the power of a single word or several letters strung together as words and then words strung together to make sentences.
Words can be so harmful and hurtful but they also can be so reassuring and give us a sense of security. Without words how could we ever communicate?
The danger with words is that they can be used in a negative way to harm people. Liars, thieves, user and so on manipulate others by using the alphabet.
I prefer to use the alphabet to teach others and expose my deepest and darkest secrets. I open myself up to scrutiny and judgement by those that do not know me or have even met me.
I so love to use my words in a romantic setting and I enjoy watching what my words can bring forth. I can take a man from being as limp as a wet, discarded leaf to as hard as the trunk of a redwood tree.
I can use words to make love to a man and to open up a completely new world of erotica for him. I can show a man what he should be feeling with my words.
Do you see the strength from the use of our alphabet? Do you appreciate the power you can derive from it? Have you met anyone that has the ability to turn you on with words and keep you aroused?
When you are adventurous, secure enough, man enough to open yourself up then come to me. Let me show you how I can use my words to make you feel so much more than you ever have in your life, let me show you my secrets.
It’s Sunday morning and once again the sun streams through my sliding glass door. I squint ass I look through the glass door wall and let myself get absorbed into the wonder of the outside world.
This world is such a beautiful wonder and so many of us take for granted what our eyes see. Most do not realize that one day will be their last day to see around them.
I pull the sheet and heavy quilted blanket up around my neck as I lie in bed and wonder. I wonder how many other people enjoy the feeling of the warmth radiating from the sheet that covered them and kept them warm through out the night.
I finally let my body take control and force me to sit upright and to exit what felt like my sarcophagi. Yes, it feels like I am entombed as I wrap myself up in the cloth that will keep me warm during my rest.
Heading for the bathroom which is of my morning ritual I expel the liquids that have sat in the reservoir of my body. I sneak a peek behind the drape that hides the window.
I grab a some toilet paper and wipe the delicate area of my feminine power and rise above the throne. Exiting the bedroom I hear the morning sounds of Luna running through the house like she is being chased.
Sitting upon the couch I watch her in all of her glory playing with the ring that came off of the gallon of milk. Milk rings are her favorite toys and she bats them across the floor and under the couch and chairs.
She slides her slim body under the hidden space that has her milk ring and more often than not she is the victor and has the milk ring in her paws or mouth.
Pets, ah yes pets are so happy with the simplest of toys and affection. We feed them, pet them, scold them, walk them, love them and most of us put our pets above humans.
Like Luna, I am happy with the simple things such as the morning sun lighting the beauty out of my window. I do not need expensive, fancy homes, cars, jewelry or gifts.
I am happy with the simple life and like a pet I thrive on love, attention, affection and the things that cost nothing. I do not need wealth to be happy and frankly I do not believe there is a single wealthy person that is happy because of their wealth.
The bottom line for me is being happy for the sake of being happy and there is nothing that feels better and more comforting than having someone lie next to us and we feel their caring, their warmth.
What would make me happy every morning? Bet you cannot guess what is my dream of morning happiness could be. Ok, let me share I would so love to have warm arms and a stiff cock to keep me happy. 🙂
He traveled constantly and he spent more time in the bed on his private plane than he did in his own penthouse. He would call his private chef and let him know when he would be home and the chef would prepare him a lovely homemade meal for a change.
So many wanted to travel and live the life he had been blessed with but even he tired of travel. He was wealthy, not rich and yes there is a difference.
He enjoyed a variety of foods and ladies and everything in between. He had a stable full of polo ponies and he invested wisely over the years. He had plenty of money, more money than any one man could ever spend.
He enjoyed sex but most of the women he bedded were typical sex partners only to last until he had his orgasm. They never were really kinky or exciting and that is what he craved.
The one woman that held his interest was someone he felt inferior to as she was quite a dominant personality. He feared being rejected by her and he feared her laughing at him not with him.
He read every word she wrote and he looked at her pictures over and over. This woman wasnt young nor was she a thin woman but a woman of age and substance instead.
He never knew for sure if what she wrote was from her own experiences or if they were fantasies put on paper. He thought about her constantly and he so wanted to taste her and he knew she was an exciting woman.
He wondered if she would be the type of woman to feed his sexual desires and his favorite fantasy. He so wanted to be with two woman as most men did.
He wanted to be tied up and helpless to be used as any two women saw fit. The very thought of a woman kissing him all over his body and then sucking his cock while the other one licked his balls and ass.
This was what he thought about more often than not and the fantasy of two women always excited him. He would lie back on his bed on his way from one country to the next and masturbate to the thought of two ladies.
His fantasies always made him get hard as a rock and he was left more often than not to stroke his own hardness. He loved his fantasies and hoped one day that he would experience them.
What man didn’t think about two women? What man didn’t want to have one woman sitting on his face while the other road is cock? What man wouldn’t love to be dominated by two women at once?
The very thought of a woman ordering him to lick her clit until she screamed out in pleasure was so hot to him while the other woman rode his cock. He loved licking a woman and he adored the taste of a woman and so wanted that perfect woman who would feed his fantasies.
He thought about their titties swinging freely and him fucking one on all fours while the other licked his ass. He had never experienced a prostrate massage and to think that a woman could give him such a strong orgasm using his prostrate was something of a curiosity to him.
He loved having his ass licked and having his cock stroked at the same was the best feeling in the world. He wished he could find the perfect woman that would keep him satisfied sexually but it wasn’t so easy finding that perfect sexual fit.
The very woman that kept his attention online was his perfect fit but here he was a wealthy, famous man that had no pull what so ever over her. She wasn’t like the others as she didn’t want his money or what it could buy.
She wanted so much more as she wanted a relationship with just one man. She wanted a sexual commitment with one man and she wanted to grow old with her soul mate.
He on the other hand had just exited a marriage and he was in no hurry to commit to anyone any time soon. He knew what he wanted but he didn’t want just one woman in his life, not yet at least.
He had lived the life of a wealthy man since his late teens and he had tasted the fruit of many a woman even though he was married. Being famous made it difficult to stay in a committed relationship without dabbling with other women sexually.
His wife was no fool and she knew her husband fucked other women but she also knew that family was important to both of them. They fought behind closed doors about his cheating and of course he told her that she was imagining his infidelities.
She would never let the public know how she truly felt and her husband did love her but her lack of sexually pleasing him was always something that he missed.
The one thing that latino mothers never did was to prepare their girls for marriage and what was expected of them in the marital bed. They did not explain to their children that not only must they be sexually available to their husbands they needed to be a freak between the sheets as well.
The typical latino wife spread her legs as often as her husband wished but other than that they did nothing to please their husbands sexually desires. The very thought of sucking cock or using a vibrator was something they never even thought about.
He learned about sex with so many other women and he had been able to try almost anything he desired sexually with the groupies that followed his life.
His wife knew of his illicit affairs with the ladies of London but she knew if she wanted to stay married she would turn a shy eye to his discretions. He spent many hours on the internet looking at porn and masturbating as he traveled frequently and didn’t bring along any of the women he bedded.
He was so fascinated with what he found on the internet he was able to live his kinky lifestyle through the monitor. He was very kinky but didn’t want anyone to know that side of himself.
The one he followed daily on the internet wrote stories that made him wonder if they were fantasy or true. He didn’t know this woman and he was to fearful of her to meet her face to face.
She knew the two most powerful things in life were money and sex. She had learned long ago the dangers of money and she had learned not to let it lead her life.
She was quite happy with her meager financial lifestyle and she had long ago quit desiring expensive items. She so loved sex and she enjoyed her daily masturbation ritual which happened several times daily.
She refused to fuck just anyone she hadn’t been with a man sexually in over six years. She knew the right man would come into her life when he was meant to and not a second before.
She had a sub that suffered from the inability to maintain a strong erection which was also known as erectile dysfunction. She made it clear to him that she would never be sexually involved with him as to do so would change the dynamic of their relationship.
Her sub had fallen in love with her and she knew it but she refused to let him get to close to her. He was married and like most men his age had no sexual relationship with his wife.
She stroked her subs ego and she even stroked his prostrate which he so loved. She turned him on and he felt a connection with her that he had never had with another woman.
He was a kinky Aquarius and she was able to feed his kinky side and he so enjoyed how much she cared for him. Like any man he enjoyed her attention but secretly in the back of his mind he so wanted to mount her.
She would never allow him to get any closer to her emotionally or physically but she did want to have a healthy sex life once again. She so hoped that her fantasy man would come into her life and spread her legs only to fill her with his manhood.
Men love nothing more than the smell of a ladies well-worn panties. Some love to sniff the panties and masturbate. There are men that absolutely adore rubbing a ladies panties on their cock and then cum on the panties.
Her little bitch was no different and he so enjoyed her panties when she allowed him to. She loved to tease him and deny him the right to touch her wet pussy as she made sure he could see her masturbating.
He was under lock and key in the corner of her room and she had angled his cage so he could barely catch a glimpse of her activities. She so enjoyed walking naked through her home and every once in a while he would get to see her in all of her glory.
She would tease him unmercifully as she made sure he could barely see her slip off her panties. She would climb back on her bed and have her favorite toy with her. Her magic wand was the greatest gift she had ever given herself. It gave her more pleasure sexually than any man she had ever been with.
She closed her eyes and thoughts of the one man she thought about constantly came to her mind. She could see his lovely naked body in her mind and she ran her hands over her erect nipples.
She loved the smoothness of her body and the thought of him touching her made her ladies sweet treat wet with desire. She had never met this man but she got so excited thinking about mounting him like a prize race horse.
Her hand slowly moved south on her body and her fingers found the moistness. She began to stroke her clit with thoughts of sexual pleasure. She spoke softly to her caged slave and she asked him if he would enjoy fucking her.
He told her it would be his honor to give her what she requested but he knew his cock was so minuscule that it would never please her. She asked him if he would enjoy watching her pleasure herself and of course he said yes.
She got off of her bed and grabbed her toy and headed to her plush sex chair which was much like a gamers chair. She plugged in her magic wand and came back and sat in her chair.
She spread her legs and her slave gave out a huge sigh and said “mistress!”. He so wanted to pound that pussy but that would never happen and he knew it. She asked him if he would be interested in sniffing her panties and he told her it would be such an honor.
She got up from her chair and headed back to her bed and she snatched up the panties. She came over to his cage and unlocked the door and slid the panties over his head.
She made sure the crotch was positioned over his nose so he could sniff and watch her play with herself. She closed and locked the door and once again placed herself in her chair.
She spread her legs wide so he could see her delicate bud and she leaned her bead back and began to fantasize about the unknown man of her dreams. She slowly stroked her wetness and she could hear her slave moan.
He asked her if he was allowed to masturbate and she denied him that pleasure. His bulging cock dripping pre-cum by the gallon. She picked up her toy and applied it to her moist clit and the vibration just about drove her insane.
She increased the speed and before she knew it she was having orgasm after orgasm. No man had ever made her squirt or have multiple orgasms but her toy was able to make her crazy with desire.
Her slave began to chew on the crotch of her panties and he watched her pleasure herself. He so wanted to masturbate but she had forbidden it and he knew he had to obey his mistress.
His cock decided it was going to cum regardless if he touched it or not and the next thing he knew he was being hit in the chest with his own cum. His cock milked itself without any help just by him watching his mistress.
She could tell by his face that he was cumming and she sat back and just laughed in her chair. She asked him if he had enjoyed the private show and he thanked her profusely. She allowed him out of his cage to take a shower and she got up and laid on her bed and took quite the blissful sleep.
He had the same fantasy since his early teens and now being a grown man he was finally going to reach out and explore his sexual desires. He was kinky and his wife had no desire to feed any of his kinky fantasies.
There relationship was on its way out even though they hadn’t filed for divorce yet there was just nothing left between the two of them. He visited a domme but his fantasy was never fulfilled and he was left feeling flat.
He finally got up the nerve to contact another domme and try to experience what had been in his mind for years. He was to shy and to nervous to talk to her face to face and had to talk to her on the phone first.
He had a difficult time telling her about his fantasies but as they talked he felt more comfortable and he began to share what he wanted to explore with her. He wanted to know if she would order him to dress in her under garments and pretend to catch him in her clothing.
She would humiliate him and order him to stroke his cock in her panties and to cum. She would then order him to take off the panties and either rub the cum in his face or order him to eat his own cum.
He wanted to taste his own orgasm and he wanted to be humiliated for being a sissy and wearing her clothes. He wanted her to wear a skirt or dress and have a strap on under her skirt.
She would lift her skirt for him and order him to get on his knees and suck her strap on. He was not unlike so many men with the fantasy of sucking cock but he didn’t want to suck a mans cock.
He had a huge foot and panty fetish and she would make him put on a pair of clean panties and she would slide of her panties and shove them in his face to smell. She would then order him to his her feet and suck her toes.
He would massage her feet and thank her for allowing him to feed the sissy within himself. She would give him everything he had dreamed about for so long and she was very good at feeding the kinky in anyone.
He thanked her for giving him everything he had so desired and he planned on seeing her on a bi-monthly basis. This woman was so self-assured and so in control and she gave dominant a totally new meaning which was such a turn on for him.
I love autumn and the changing colors of the leaves and the feel of the fall weather. When I wake up I have to get up and pee and if I do not put on my slippers the cold floor makes me run not walk to the bathroom.
After I relieve myself I run to the bed and dive back in like a child hurrying to build his blanket tent. I pull the covers up to my neck and my boys Gabriel and Michael jump on me and lick my face as they need to get up to pee as well.
We lie in bed as I try to clear the fog from my mind and we play and I pet them while looking out the sliding glass door to such a beautiful vision. When I wake in the morning it takes me some time to shake the cobwebs of a long forgotten dream from my mind.
I think about so many things but the beauty of the morning takes me to a place that is indescribable. Breath taking and so serene the vision I am blessed to visit makes me feel welcomed and warm.
I think of the day that I will wake up to my soul mate next to me with his arm resting on my hip. I look forward to the day that the scent that I wake up to is his exotic cologne and the smell of maleness.
I look forward to turning over and placing my arm on his abdomen and my head on his chest. The feel of his fingers stroking my head and the pleasantries of a good morning with that one special person.
Do you have those same thoughts or is it just my dreams getting in the way of starting a new day? Am I the only one that has fantasies of great love in my bed as well as my day-to-day life? I truly think not………
She walked from the stove to the fridge and grabbed the fresh seafood that she had collected earlier in the day from the market. She was making a heavenly seafood dish as they both so loved seafood as well as a good steak.
He walked into the kitchen and laid his keys on the counter but she was so involved in what she was doing she didn’t hear him. He walked up behind her and slowly lifted up her dress and rubbed his hands over her satin panties.
He loved the feel and smell of her and he slowly slipped down to his knees and he moved her body over to the counter where he ordered her to bend over. She did as she was told and she spread her legs waiting for the pleasure that was soon to come and take over her body.
He kissed her inner thighs and worked his way to her center of pleasure and he licked and sucked on her center until she cried out with an orgasm. She turned around and grabbed him by his tie and pulled him up to her and kissed him deep.
She undid his tie and unbuttoned his shirt and pulled the tail out of his pants. She rubbed the crotch and she felt the hardness of his beautiful cock and she couldn’t wait to remove his pants and take him.
She undid his zipper and undid the zipper and clasp and his pants dropped around his ankles. She rubbed his cock through his boxer briefs and he was stranding strong and proud awaiting the pleasure she would give him.
She slid her hand under his waist band and searched out his cock and she began to rub her hand over his stiffness. She always enjoyed how soft the skin was on his lovely member and she so enjoyed taking him into her mouth.
She slowly slid to her knees and on her way down she pulled his briefs down with her. He always kept himself shaved as he knew she disliked pubic hair. She massaged his balls with one hand and used the other hand to take his cock and bring it to her lips.
She slowly licked the head of his cock and took the head into her mouth, teasing the underside of the head of his member. She slowly took him deeper and deeper until he was fully engulfed into the warmth of her lovely mouth.
She stroked his cock with her hand as her mouth worked its magic up and down the length of his manhood. She knew that men loved their balls massaged as their cock was being sucked and she always did it so well.
She began to increase the speed of her mouth going up and down on him and this drove him crazy. He so loved having his cock sucked and he enjoyed it more than actually fucking.
She could tell he was on the verge of shooting his wad and she was ready to swallow every bit of his seed. He grabbed her ears and fucked her mouth and finally came giving her every drop of himself.
Both of them were spent and she slowly stood up and walked over to the counter and grabbed the bottle of wine. She poured both of them the lovely red liquid and she took his hand and led him to the Davenport.
They sat down and enjoyed their wine and the quiet time that was so comfortable between the two of them. He put his arm around her and rubbed her cheek affectionately and she rubbed his chest. Both of them cared deeply about each other and the sex was always so wonderful between the two of them.
He wanted nothing more than to please his mistress and he would do anything she requested of him. He swept and scrubbed her floors, did her laundry, pressed her linens and kept her home immaculately clean.
He maintained her flower beds and kept the bushes trimmed as well as the grass cut and fertilized. He was her chauffer and he ran her bath and bathed her as well as laid out her clothing and foot wear for the day.
He was her everything when she wanted him he was there right by her side. He made sure she had the bull of her choice as often as she chose and he kept behind the scenes when she was being pleasured.
He so wanted to orally please his mistress but he knew that would never happen as his place was to fulfill her desires and to cross the sub mistress line would never happen. He respected her so much and he knew she had the power and he was to follow her lead.
Financially, things were not there best for her and she needed extra income to make her monthly payments. She wasnt extravagant in the least bit and she lived quite meager compared to most people.
She had learned long ago that material possessions left one hollow and lonely and that family and friends that could be trusted were all that truly mattered in this world. She also knew that her spirituality gave her great strength and power most would never have or understand.
There had been this slave that would contact his mistress every couple of weeks in hopes that she would give him the time of day. He was a slave that needed a new owner and he was willing to do anything she said as long as she would take him on as hers.
She knew that her sub had a secret desire to suck cock of a younger male so she decided to meet the slave and see if he was worthy of serving her. They met for lunch and had an in-depth meeting and she laid out what was expected of him.
He would be available for her to use whenever she saw fit and he would literally do anything for her. She had a wonderful relationship with her sub and wanted to gift him the cock of a young slave.
She would have her sub wear a leather hood so he could not see who or what was before him and she would order her slave to stand naked in front of her kneeling sub and he would guide his cock into the open mouth of the sub.
She ordered her sub to suck the cock before him and stroke the balls the deeper he took the cock into his mouth. He would stroke the cock with the warmth of his mouth and take him deeper into his throat with each thrust.
The slave was ordered to move his cock in and out of the subs mouth faster and faster until he exploded his load deep into the throat of the sub. The sub would lick the slaves cock clean swallowing every drop of slave cum.
The sub would stroke the limp cock of the young slave until he was hard again and the sub would turn around for the slave. the slave would take his hard cock and lubricate it as well as the subs ass.
Slowly entering the ass of the sub the mistress sat back and filmed as the slaves cock disappeared into the ass of the sub. The mistress ordered the sub to request the slave to fuck him deeper and harder with each stroke.
The mistress was making a nice video of this session and both the sub and slave were obviously enjoying themselves. The sub was finally getting his virgin ass explored by the cock that he had sucked and he was enjoying every minute of it.
The slave could see how pleased the mistress was and he was looking forward to watching the video again and again. The mistress got so excited by watching the sub and slave that she began to stroke her clit.
The slave was on the verge of an orgasm as was the mistress and the sub was dripping pre cum as well. At last all three of them had wonderfully strong orgasms and they looked forward to the next time they had a session.
The video was edited and music added in the appropriate spots of the video and they were going to sit back and watch the movie they had made before it was put on the internet for sale.
Soon enough the sub and slave would be doing streaming video and they would have an audience that would pay well to watch. The mistress would finally have the income to pay off a loan against her home and make her life so much easier.
She never allowed her cuck to be in the same room when she was having sex with a bull. She had a special room built with a two-way mirror and she allowed him to watch her and her bull have an evening of fun.
He was ordered to replace the plain cotton egyptian sheets with the luxurious burgundy satin ones especially for evenings with a bull. He changed the sheets as she had ordered and she had him prepare a cheese and fruit tray for her and her bull to snack on.
He was also ordered to bring a bottle of their best Champaign and chocolates and set the tray on the night stand. Earlier that evening she had him draw her bath and bath her as well as shave her delicate areas.
She hated hair anywhere on the body except the head and she had her cuck maintain a smooth body at all times. Bathed her and washed her hair and helped her step out of the tub.
He dried her off with the plush bath towel and he applied body cream to her entire body. This was the only time he was ever allowed the pleasure of touching her nakedness.
She told him she was very horny and she ordered him to get her magic wand. He knew that the magic wand would give her an orgasm that made her legs shutter with delight.
She bent over the granite counter in the bathroom and he placed the wand upon her clit. She had an earth shattering orgasm within fifteen seconds of the wand vibrating against her clit.
Once she had recovered from her release he ran a wash cloth under the warm water and washed her delicate bud. He helped her slip her feet into her mules and he slid the satin robe over her shoulders.
He walked with her to the bed and removed her mules and gave her a wonderful foot massage. She loved the massages as they relieved so much tension from her body and the foot rubs felt so wonderful.
He removed her robe and he pulled back the covers of her bed and watched as she slid her beautiful naked form under the covers. He told her he would be right back with her guest of the evening.
He brought the bull into her bedroom and she ordered her cuck to help the bull disrobe. He took each piece of clothing and hung it up so the clothing didnt litter her bedroom.
He pulled back the covers for the bull and once the bull was under them he covered the bull up. His mistress ordered him to serve herself as well as the bull the cheese and fruit platter as well as the champaign.
He did as he had been instructed and then he removed himself from the room. He was so excited waiting for the evening to get into high gear but he knew she was very slow and sensual in her bedroom.
He left her room and found his rightful place in the chair behind the one way mirror. He could hear their conversation and watch her in action which was so hot he couldn’t help but pleasure himself.
He watched and listened as they chatted and joked and then finally she took their glasses and sat them on the night stand. She began to his her bull and run her hands over his body and finally finding his hard cock she began to stroke him.
She ordered her bull to get into the 69 position as she wanted to taste him as much as she wanted him to taste her. She sucked on his hardness and fondled his balls as he licked and tugged on her clit.
It didn’t take long for both of them to have an explosive orgasm and they both licked every drop of orgasm liquid from each others bodies. He got so excited watching his mistress suck the bulls big cock he couldn’t help but stroke his own meager member.
He knew he would never get the pleasure of licking or fucking his mistress so he had to do with the honor of watching and pleasuring himself. She had ordered him to masturbate behind the mirror and to eat every bit of his own orgasm leaving not a single drop to be seen anywhere in the room.
He looked through the mirror and watched as the bull pulled his mistress up on all fours and buried his member into her. He grabbed her hips and fucked her deep as she ordered him to fuck her deeper and faster.
His mistress and her bull played all night long and as the sun rose she rang the bell next to the bed which was meant for him to come into the room. He was once again ordered to draw her a bath.
As her drew the bath she had ordered her bull to shower and dress and remove himself from her presence. Her cuckhold helped the bull dress after his shower and showed him out.
He bathed his mistress and changed the sheets to her favorite cotton egyptian ones. He helped her into bed and he knew she would be asleep shortly after he covered her up. He then exited back to his cage in the corner and both the cuck and his mistress fell into a blissful sleep.
She had been a widow for over four years and had not let a single man into her bed in all of that time. She was a very sexual woman and the touch of a man always excited her. She was tired of pleasing herself and had read about a local auction full of bulls.
She told her cuckhold that they would be going out that evening and to lay out her black lingerie top that she had just purchased along with her black pants. She also told him to shine her thigh high boots and make himself quite presentable for the affairs of the evening.
She sat in front of her makeup mirror and he picked up the hairbrush and began to brush her medium length blonde hair. He loved pleasing his mistress and it always made him smile when she acknowledged his efforts.
She had confided a great amount of information about herself and her private life and no one knew her better than her cuck. He slept with her but never was allowed to touch her or have sex with her.
She even refused to let him pleasure her orally as to do so was to dilute the power exchange and control that she had always kept a tight reign on. He was her little bitch and he did as she told him, no questions asked.
She had sat back as he brushed her hair and she had told him that she was finally going to get a bull to satisfy her sexual needs and that he, the cuck was going to pay the handsome rental fee for the bull.
Her cuck had the smallest penis she had ever seen and she knew he could never satisfy her with such a small member. The auction guaranteed her an attractive, well built male with an average cock size of eight inches and a gurth that was impressive.
They walked into the auction and she was lead to the front row where she had two seats reserved just for her bidding. She undid the buttons on toga double-breasted coat and he helped her remove it.
He took her coat over to the coat check and made sure that they hung it in its own coat bag. She wasn’t a very picky woman at all but he was very picky and made decisions in her favor that he knew she never would.
He wanted his mistress to have the best that life had to offer even though he knew she was happy with anything he gave her. She appreciated everyone and everything anyone did for her.
He picked up two flutes of Champaign on the way back to his seat and he asked her if it was ok for him to drink the lovely liquid in the expensive Champaign flutes. She gave him permission to do so and they sipped slowly on the lovely liquid.
The lights dimmed in the ceiling behind them and the lights in front of them were focused on center stage. The bulls would come out one at a time and every inch of them were available for examining.
There was every ethnic group represented and all of them were in excellent health. She had just returned from examining a string of polo ponies and she knew exactly what to look for in animals as well as men.
She had viewed several bulls but they did not appeal to her what so ever and she looked over the list of ones that were yet to come. She looked at the stats of one bull and she thought he might have what it took to please her.
There was a picture of each bull with complete measurements including height, weight, length and girth of cock and even their shoe size. The auction house knew how to promote and get the highest bid for the services of such fine bulls.
It was finally time for the bull of her choice to walk across the stage. He was pure muscle and hi s ass was solid muscle as well. He was self-assured and had shaved from his neck down.
He was attractive and she asked to see his cock in full bloom. He was only partially excited and he welcomed her touch to make his cock stand to full length. She walked up and began to fondle him and that excited him so much he became rock hard.
She was quite pleased with this male specimen and she instructed her cuck to bid on the bull. She informed the cuck that she had no intention of leaving the auction without her pick and that it was his responsibility to be sure he offered a high enough bid that no one else could match.
The bidding was fierce and he had to be extremely aggressive but he was able to secure his bid and purchase the services of the bull for his mistress. He paid the price and he told the buck that he was to follow him to his mistress.
He introduced his prize to his mistress and she was very pleased and impressed with the way her cuck cared so much for her. She was impressed that he would go to such lengths to be sure that he won the bid to please her.
Her cuck looked forward to the evening ahead as he would get to watch the bull please his mistress. He was not jealous but extremely envious of the bull as he knew the bull would get the opportunity to taste the juices of his lovely mistress.
People ask me if God has forsaken them because they are in the bdsm lifestyle. God doesn’t forsake any of us as he has given us free will. We are free to make our own choices but we are not free to choose the results of those choices.
If we do something that is wrong and we know it is wrong in our heart we will suffer from that choice. We can ask God to forgive us and if we are pure in heart when asking then I am sure he does grant forgiveness.
I am not religious but I am a very spiritual person and believe that God has great power and strength. I also believe that so many have turned their backs on God and have let greed lead their lives.
I am not one to judge others and like everyone else I have an opinion but most of the time keep it to myself. It is not up to me to judge as I do not wish to be judges but to only to accept and be accepted.
I have had things happen in my life that I know was caused by an intervention and no oGod doesnt close doors he is always opening other doors for all us, even those in the bdsm lifestyle.ne can tell me different. I believe that God has chosen certain people to be rich and famous as I do believe that being in that situation is the hardest life of all.
So many think rich and famous have the best lives but I know that isn’t so. Money and fame make lives easier in one way but so much harder than most of us in other ways. Would you want to live in constant uncertainty if the person you are with is with you for yourself or for your fame and money?
Would you want to always worry who was your true friend or if those people are using you? I would hate to have to wonder if everyone in my life was a true and honest person or only in my life because I provide a paycheck.
God makes the majority of us average and we have what we need to get through each and every day. God also gives some people a tougher road to follow as they may be poor and homeless.
We are constantly tested and given tasks and how we perform those tasks says volumes about us as a person. God is by our side at all times and he takes us by he hand when we feel lost.
His legs were cramping up as was his insides as he had to pee so bad but she had him locked in his cage and hadn’t let him out yet. He was never allowed to share her bed or her body and he was her toy, her slave.
He didnt know where she kept her other slave but he did know that they were required to keep her happy by fulfilling her every demand. They had been ordered to maintain the gardening, keep the house clean, laundry washed, dried and ironed, beds made and there was never to be a dirty dish in the sink.
They were always kept busy and she would use them for her entertainment, usually during the weekends. She would have clients that wanted to experience forced by and the slaves would be there to be of service to her.
She also had friends that enjoyed watching the slaves suck each others cocks, lick the boots of their domme, fuck each other or let one of their domme’s friends or clients fuck them.
She had taught them well but they would always make mistakes so she would have to punish them. They loved being punished and a good spanking was always a favorite of both of them.
She would give them an over the knee spanking leaving their asses bright red and throbbing. This was so mentally as well as physically satisfying to them and they would secretly do thing to make their domme mad just so she would punish them.
She kept them naked or in a thong when she had a client because they were so much more appealing with that tiny piece of fabric hiding their manhood and exposing their ass cheeks.
She would put them in humblers and slap their balls hard as she ordered them to masturbate each other. She slapped their balls with her hand, crop, brush and other implements.
She tied them up and suspended them, spanked them, poured hot wax on them, used a strap on their tight little asses, slapped them in the face, spit on them and basically abused them for the sheer pleasure of others.
She finally walked into the bedroom and he could hear her mules connecting with the floor as she walked towards him. She told him he was a good pet and asked him if he wold like to come out to pee.
He told her “yes, my beautiful Mistress” and she bent over and unlocked the cage he lived in. She hooked the leash to the collar around his neck and he followed her on all fours to the bathroom.
The other slave was already in the bathroom waiting for them and the one on all fours was pulled up by the leash to a standing position. His hands were then handcuffed behind his back and the other slave ordered to direct the stream of urine coming from the slaves cock.
Once he had relieved himself he was ordered to step back from the toilet and the other slave was ordered to sit his naked body upon the toilet. He was then ordered to suck the cock of the slave that was standing.
He was to suck his cock until he came and to lick the cock clean and swallow every drop of cum. He was ordered to massage the slaves balls and finger his ass until he was to the point of cumming.
He was ordered to tease and deny the orgasm about three times and then finally he allowed the other slave to cum. Their domme enjoyed the scene and filmed the entertainment only to post it on the internet for purchase.
Her slaves her filmed regularly doing their chores or being used for her entertainment and she profited handsomely from the videos. They enjoyed making the videos for her and tried to enhance the videos any way they could.
They had recently made a video where one slave had his arms and legs tied spread eagled on the bed. The other slave was shaving the crotch and balls and preparing for a session of hot wax and strap on play.
Next to the bed on the night stand was wax candles, a lighter, lubrication, strap on and condoms. He had finished up the shaving and wiped the clean-shaven area dry so the skin was prepared for the hot wax play.
She walked into the room with a lovely black lingerie outfit and her thigh high boots and she looked sexy as fuck. She walked over and picked up a candle and lit it and she then ordered the other slave to start licking the asshole of the slave tied down.
He began licking the ass of the slave as she held the candle high above the bed and watched the droplets of hot wax land on and around his cock. She then walked to the freezer and took out the bag of ice and brought it into the room.
She placed the ice on his skin and it cooled it and when the hot wax landed upon his skin he could no longer feel the wax. He was enjoying the wax play and he loved having his asshole licked and his cock was so hard he thought he would burst.
She ordered the other slave to rub the balls and cock of the slave that was tied down and he was ordered to stroke the cock until it burst with pleasure. He was then ordered to clean up the liquid expelled from the cock.
He went into the bathroom and ran the water until it was warm and then ran the wash cloth under it until it was thoroughly soaked. He then wrung out the excess water and walked back into the room.
He cleaned up the subdued slave and then he was ordered to put on the strap on and to fuck the ass of the slave while she directed him. She told him to enter the ass slowly after he lubed up his strap on as well as the asshole.
She ordered him to untie the ankles of the slave and have him bend his knees. He did as he was told and there in front of him was an exposed asshole waiting to be penetrated.
He slowly entered the ass and as he did he could see the cock getting hard. As he slowly entered the ass she walked over and placed a surgical glove upon her hand and she squirted two shots of lube into her hand.
He was entering the ass very slowly and she began to stroke the cock and the slave began to moan in pleasure. He begged for her to allow him to cum and to have his ass fucked harder and deeper.
She could feel his orgasm building and she allowed the other slave to fuck the ass deeper and faster and she stroked his cock faster. His orgasm was building and he finally exploded.
He had never felt anything so strong and enjoyable in his life and he thanked his mistress as well as the other slave. The other slave cleaned up and released the slave and they were ordered to start doing their daily chores, which they did with great pleasure.
Not everyone has an exciting life and even those that do have times that are so mundane even they are bored to tears. I find wonder in imagining future pleasures, may they be doing something as simple as catching my limit of perch for the day or be it thinking about my next sexual encounter with the one I adore.
The very thought of pushing him against the way and placing my knee firmly between his knees and forcing his legs open makes he hot. I find excitement in thinking of kissing him and running my hand over his chest and down to his groin.
The very thought of rubbing his masculinity through his trousers is a turn on for me. The very thought that my kisses make him hard with desire makes me wet with pleasure.
I find simple pleasure in allowing my minds eye to undress him, one button at a time and then to go over his body with kisses. The thought of slowly lowering myself into a kneeling position before him makes me ache with desire.
Knowing that he is going to enjoy my kissing and caressing his cock makes me feel powerful and desirable. The very thought of running my hands over his muscular ass cheeks makes me want to beg for more.
Taking him in one hand as the other caresses his balls makes my mouth water as I slowly take him deep within the darkness of my throat. Giving him oral sex is exciting and so special I think of it with vorfreude.
One day he will tire of the foolish and silliness of the young women he tastes and he will want to be with a woman who knows the pure pleasures of unadulterated sexual pleasures. One day he will realize the only one for him is the one he stalks like the cheetah after the antelope.
The man who thinks he is controlling others is the one that is being controlled by the very person he wishes to control. To constantly read what another has written and reread that person words over and over shows who the true controller is.
It was going to be another year of high school nothing special just another boring year hanging with his boys. He carried his math book down by his side as he strolled through the hallways thinking of nothing special.
He turned the corner and there she was, a girl of beauty he had never even thought possible could exist. She had dropped her pencil and had bent over to pick it up and as she arose she looked at him through beautiful eyes.
He knew he had to have her, find out who she was, her name, where she lived. He saw her turn and walk away with some girls he knew and he would find out who she was before the end of the day.
The detective within him found one of the girls that “his girl” was walking with and he cornered her, ferreting out the information he sought out about his beauty. He let it be known he wanted to meet this girl, take her out, spend time with her.
Like most high school kids he used his channel of friends to get the message to her and they played the “do you want to get to know me” game. Her friends told her what a catch he was, how she was so lucky to have caught his eye and how she would be a fool if she didnt go out with him.
The football game Friday night would be a perfect opportunity to ask her if she would like to go with him. He walked by her locker every change he got hoping to run into her and he happened to come by at the perfect time.
She was reaching up to the top shelf trying to get a book that had been pushed further back and difficult to reach. He walked up and asked her if he could help her and sheepishly she said yes, could you please get me my book?
He reached up and grabbed the book for her with the vision of her skirt pulling up as she reached up for the book. He felt his heart race and he could feel beads of sweat form on his forehead.
Then he handed her the book and he asked her who her teacher was for english as he handed her the english book. He told her he had the same teacher the year prior and the class was easy.
They both smiled and let out a small laugh as their eyes met. He got over being nervous rather quickly as he felt so comfortable with this girl, as if he had known her forever.
He asked her to the game Friday night and that is how it all began. They dated and had no desire to want to date anyone else. They grew together over the few years of high school.
In their senior year they began to talk of their hopes, dreams and wishes and how they wanted careers, the house with the picket fence and the 2.5 children. They were a lovely couple that obviously fit together like a hand and glove.
Once they graduated they had a beautiful wedding and they went on to reach for their desired careers. They were a smart couple as they had put off having children until they were established.
On a cool Saturday morning they were in bed spooning and chatting and out of no where she felt sick. She ran to the bathroom and threw up and both of them thought she had the flu.
She waited but after several days of being very sick they began to wonder if she was pregnant. Both of the giddy with the thought of a child in her womb they were happy even if she was sick.
After a week of being very ill she went to the dr. as it wasnt normal to be so sick. The dr. ran tests and sent her home. She received a call from the dr. office and they requested her to come back in to see the dr.
She set the appt. and felt a knot in her stomach, the knot of fear of the unknown that we get when something isn’t right and we know it. She didn’t tell him about the appt or anyone else for that matter.
She went to the appointment and sat in the waiting room as her nerves began to build making her stomach churn with a sickening feeling. The nurse called her back but this time she didnt weigh her or give her a gown to put on.
The dr. came in and he was very stoic as he told her that she had cervical cancer and he gave her a name of a dr. that specialized in that type of cancer. The dr. answered as many questions as he could for her but it was obvious to her that it was painful for him to have to tell her such news.
She went home and told him the news and being a positive bloke he told her they would get through this together. They had been married five years and it was the happiest time for both of them but the time was nearing an end.
He held her hand through the chemo treatments and he told her he loved her even as she lost her hair and couldn’t keep anything she ate down. He loved her regardless of the illness.
It tore him apart to see her suffer so but his heart just wasnt ready to let her go. It took a toll on him as she withered away before his eyes. He would never love another woman the way he loved her and he sat by her bed and held her hand as she took her last breath.
He went through the next five months living in a form of denial as he refused to allow himself to grieve properly. His friends set him up on a blind date even though he wasnt ready.
He took her out and then brought her back to his place where she leaned over to kiss him. She placed her hand on his stiff cock and he immediately had a premature ejaculation.
This worried him terribly as this had never been a problem before and he feared this could be a permanent failure on his part. He then started to investigate the world of bdsm.
He had a dominant female friend that put a humbler on him and she pulled hard on it and once again he prematurely ejaculated. She was pissed he came on her floor and ordered him to lick up his own cum.
He had found a website, which was a way to connect with others in the bdsm world. She found him as she searched new members in her area, she reached out to him as she did many newbies.
She always tried to help those new to the lifestyle as with any website their were people who lied and used others. She tried to help newbies and protect them as she hated it when people took advantage of those new to the lifestyle.
She reached out to him and told him if he ever had any questions to feel free to contact her. She was a pro domme but she wasn’t soliciting him and she knew how his heart ached for the loss of his love.
She knew by chatting with him that he wasn’t allowing himself to grieve as he should. The loss was so painful he lived in denial as it made him feel safe. He was a handsome man, a man who would one day love again but that day would not be today or tomorrow.
She tried to get him to accept the fact that grieving is the only way to heal and that he wasnt ready to date again. His friends tried so hard to help him but he had to help himself first.
He had to let the pain in his heart escape and that was the hardest thing he had ever done. Trying to let go because the pain meant she was still with him and he just didn’t want to let her go.
His new friend the domme brought him into her fold and she played with him. She didn’t charge him but she did let him experience different things in the bdsm world. Her goal was to help him with the premature ejaculation and she knew that this problem was directly associated with the loss of his wife.
His denial of grieving and the fact that he was depressed didn’t help the situation at all. He listened intently to his new friend and he knew she was right, he knew he needed to deal with the loss instead of burying it.
He enjoyed pain and his domme decided to teach him the joys of cbt. She tied his ankles together and hooked him to a wench that lifted him up off of the floor feet first. She tied a belt just below his knees as he hung like a fish on a hook.
She started giving him a good caning on his ass and then his balls. By the time she was done his ass had welts and his balls were black and blue. He enjoyed the cbt session but his main concern was his pre ejaculation issues.
He was young and strong and should not be dealing with pre ejac issues. The domme put a humbler on his balls and pulled hard on it and he ejaculated all over the floor. She then ordered him to lick up every drop.
She released him from the gantry and handcuffed him to the ceiling eye bolts. She put the parachute on his balls then put a can of soup on it to be used as weights. His balls were pulled down as she stroked his cock.
Just as he was ready to cum she wrapped his cock in a semi frozen bag of ice which took away his erection. She did this several times and finally he begged her to let him cum
She told him she would allow him an orgasm and as he built up to cum he was over come with the strongest orgasm of his life. It was the longest and strongest orgasm he had ever experienced.
She let him go and he gave her a hug and thanked her for her time and the lessons she had taught him. He told her he would visit her again and hopefully she could stop his pre ejac all together.
The sun gleamed through the window and danced across the wall as it continued to rise higher in the sky. She was in a melancholy mood as she removed each picture from the wall.
The pictures represented years of her life, years of her children’s lives and years of her marriage. Only she knew the deepest meaning of each and every 8 x 10 and only she felt the tug at her heart when she looked closely at some of the photographs.
She would remove a picture and slowly work her way down the ladder and place the framed photograph in the safety of the box below. Like so many others her photographs were her closest memories to a life once lived and shared.
She took several steps up the ladder and rested her eyes on one photograph in particular. The photo was of her and her husband with their daughter sitting in between them.
She remembered it has a happier time but not the happiest by a long shot. Her daughter was always dressed in cute dresses with matching hats as she was quite a hairless child until she was almost two years of age.
She was a cute little girl and her mother stood on the ladder with a smile sneaking out of the sides of her lips. She was remembering times that were funny regarding the growth and development of her daughter.
She never felt close to her husband as he was the weaker of the two and she was always the dominant one. She controlled the finances, purchases, vacations and meals. He controlled the cleaning of the house, laundry, dishes and yard work.
Looking at the last few pictures on the wall she reached out and removed the one of her and her husband. It was a picture of their second year of marriage and meant nothing to her at all.
She started to waver on the ladder and she had to either grab the ladder and right herself or save the picture from breaking. She chose to safe herself and in slow motion she watched the picture tumble to the ground.
The frame it the ground and was left in splinters and the glass in shards. She let out a sigh not because of the damage to the picture but because of the mess she would have to clean up.
Her marriage was based on the pro creation of her daughter, not of love or respect as so many marriages are based upon. She was now on a mission to find real love and a relationship that would feed her intellectual side as well as her physical side.
The men that contacted her were not appealing either physically or mentally for the most part. The few men that she had been attracted to chatted with her and then disappeared.
She knew the kind of man she wanted, one that strong, secure, intelligent, sexy, romantic and knew when to lead and when to follow. She had pretty much given up on ever finding anyone to love and sexually she had realized her best friend contained two C batteries.
She wanted to be physical so bad with a man but her morals and ethics refused to allow her to have random sex. She needed a committment before she would have sex with anyone.
The commitment was that they were going to be sexually active with no one but each other. She had basically given up on ever finding that one that would make her world whole and she was living a very sad and lonely existence that she could not see ever-changing.
He had always been so respected by the public as he was considered a very private family man. His family did come first and so did his privacy but as the years passed by he became totally disillusioned with the life he had been leading.
Like most men that had been married for over ten years he was tired of being desired because he was the provider and he resented the fact that his sex life was beyond boring and stale.
He did what most men do as he kept his eye on porno instead of cheating on his wife and the thought of the public finding out made him cringe. He wasn’t looking for anyone to keep him busy on the side and he wasn’t looking for random sex or to be side tracked from his marriage.
He just happened to have one of those days where he was in the right place at the right time and when he saw her he was drawn to her like a moth to the flame. There was an instant attraction between the two of them but he knew he wasnt interested in a long term relationship.
They had a nice leisurely dinner and the more they talked the more the attraction grew. One thing led to another and before he knew it he was between her legs as she tried to get between his ears.
She was a smart, savvy young woman but she was no dummy and she knew an older man had much to offer her. She knew he was mature, experienced, had his own place, could provide for her needs and provide her with the children she so wanted.
He had no idea that she would slowly get under his skin like a tick and she would try to manipulate him into a serious relationship that would lead to marriage. He was in no way ready for that but she was good, very good at manipulation and saying the right thing to make him feel desired.
He had no idea that she would randomly forget to take her birth control so when she got pregnant it would be a total surprise to both of them. He was smart though and used a condom and flushed it when he was done.
She was pretty, young, smart, funny and she worshipped him but the problem was they grew up in different time frames and valued different things. This would never change and he knew it so he just enjoyed her company and the sex.
As time passed he found himself not to be happy at all and actually missing the family unit he once had. He knew he would never marry this young girl and he did not want to raise more kids.
He began to lose interest in her but didn’t want to hurt her. He didn’t know how to cut her lose but he knew he would have to if he were to ever find his real happiness. She on the other hand had no idea that he was thinking of ending the relationship so she continued to play him as best she could.
There was only one woman who could give him the happiness he so badly was in search of but he just wasnt ready to settle down. He knew this woman was a no-nonsense type of woman and she would not tolerate the bullshit he was able to give to his current little fling.
He just wasnt ready for a real woman who knew how to deal with men like him but she also knew how to fulfill his hopes and wishes. He really needed to get a grip and grow up and be the man he was meant to be.
She wasnt like most dommes and the difference was so desirable to the men she services. She met them in a public place so they could “get a feel” for each other and to confirm that she was real.
They would meet at the local restaurant or pub and they would have either a meal or just a drink as they chatted. She never drank alcohol or allowed those she did a session with to consume alcohol or drugs .
She found out what she needed to know about each person before their session and she would have them follow her to her place. They would enter her private dungeon from an outside entrance. They were never allowed to enter the main living quarters of her home or to meet her children or pets.
She would order them to remove their clothing except for their socks and she would put wrist cuffs on them and hook them to the eye hooks in the ceiling. Depending on the type of session they chose she would start with a sensual touch.
She found it most important for her clients to be relaxed as she got so many newbies who were scared and shaking. She would lightly touch their back and down their sides, over their ass and up their chest. She came close to their cock but never touched it as her touch aroused them and made them so relaxed.
She would order them to spread their legs and most wanted to experience tease and denial along with some cbt. She would run her fingers lightly down their back and over their ass and slowly she would flutter her fingers on the inside of their spread thighs.
This always had the same effect on men as they so loved it. They got erect and hard as rocks as she teased them unmercifully. She would walk around to the front of them and put on nipple clamps and then she would slide gloves on her hands as touching the penis that could and would give her a sample of body fluids.
she refused to allow others body fluids to mix with her own in any way, shape or form and being safe was very important to her. She never had sex with any of the men and being a sensual domme she would be gracious and allow them to have an orgasm near the end of their session.
She would go from cbt to spanking to flogging to sensual touch and then she would bring them to an earth shattering orgasm as one of her clients proclaimed. He had told her it was the absolute best orgasm he had ever had and he tipped her handsomely as well.
She enjoyed her clients on all levels and she had met some very important men and she had built some wonderful friendships. She had one client come to her for extreme cbt and he wanted to push his pain limits but once she cuffed him and hooked him to the ceiling it was obvious he was physically uncomfortable.
He had told her he had literally shattered his ankle and he was having shooting pains. She unhooked him and had him sit down and put his foot on her lap. Her tens unit which was used for cbt was now going to be used for a legitimate medical problem.
She put the pads that were hooked to the electrodes onto his ankle in several different spots and she turned on the tens unit slowly. She slowly increased the intensity until he was comfortable with it and she massaged his foot as the electrical shocks shot through his foot and ankle.
The intensity was perfect and it helped stimulate blood flow and they chatted for the next hour as she massaged his foot and ankle. Their bdsm session turned into a medical session and once he felt better she got up and massaged his shoulders.
Her sessions ran in time slots of an hour but she spent an additional twenty minutes massaging him. He felt much better and got dressed and gave her a nice tip for her time and thanked her for being so loving and caring.
He told her that she was so different from most dommes and that he had really enjoyed the time with her and he was even going to contact his dr. about prescribing a tens unit.
He had promised to contact her later and set up another appointment for a bdsm session when he was up to and like all of her clients she gave him a big hug and sent him on his way.
She was glad that she was who she was and that she brought happiness to so many and it wasnt about money or what she could get from her clients. She just hated being associated with dommes that took out issues on clients or took advantage of the power she had over her clientele.
She knew she was special and those that spent time with her could feel and see the difference in her from other dommes. She enjoyed making her clients happy and for her that is what bdsm was all about, making herself as well as her clientele happy.
He was lying on his stomach with his arms by his head and his legs spread, he was snoring lightly and his long hair cradled his angelic face. He was at peace and in a blissful rest and I couldn’t help but touch his back with my fingers ever so lightly. I watched as the goose bumps covered his skin and a bit of a smile appeared on his face.I slid my hand down to his tight ass and patted it gently.
He began to stir and drew his left leg up and tilted his body slightly onto his hip and I could see the tip of his cock peeking out and I knew he was hard, he was so very hard and I knew I had the touch. He sat up quickly and grabbed me throwing me down on the bed and kissing me with all the passion of a man who loved a woman. His kisses became lighter and more romantic as we held each other closely and felt the heat from each others bodies.
We had waited so very long to be together and everything had finally come together including us and it felt right, it was right and it was our destiny to be together. He cupped my breast and took my nipple into his mouth which aroused me like crazy. I got turned on just touching his bare chest and I ran my hand down the length of his body until I reached his cock.
I began to stroke him slowly and tell him I wanted to fuck him and I could feel the pre cum on my hand and I slowly worked my way down to his golden rod and took him slowly into my warm, wet mouth. He began to moan and as I took him deeper into my mouth his moans grew louder and louder and I stroked his cock with my hand as my mouth went up and down on him.
I looked down at his feet and his toes were literally curling and I knew I was making his body dance with excitement and it wouldn’t be long before he entered me slowly and fucking me. He grabbed me and pulled me up to him and kissed me and forced my legs apart and positioned himself for take off. He entered me slowly which took longer than he expected as I was tight, very tight for a woman my age ane when he finally was able to completely enter me he looked into my eyes and said “I love you” with every ounce of love he had.
He quickened his pace and exploded which obviously shocked him as he had staying power but this wasn’t about fucking, this was about two people melting into one as we were meant to be. Neither of us were disappointed we just felt such completeness that we were finally able to be together as we had waited for so very long. There is a moment when two people reach a point that is beyond love, it is a complete awareness of each and nothing matters but the those two people and that is the place we had reached.FINALLY
Why is it when we split with our mate its fine for us to start seeing someone else which probably was the catalyst to leaving the original relationship we were in. We get tired of being taken for granted, being there to pay the bills, taken for granted that we will repair the things that break down and pay the bills.
We start secretly seeing someone else because they give us the attention we no longer get at home, they give us the sex we no longer get either. We get that feeling in the pit of our stomach that says “I cant wait to see her/him again”.
We find ourselves enjoying ourselves so much that we make the move to leave the original relationship for good. We feel bad for leaving but we are in such a euphoric state that we do not care how are original mate really feels.
Then the months pass by and the newness of the relationship with the “younger woman” or new man begins to wear off. We get tired of the age difference and lack of serious communication that we so desire.
Our “x” finally makes the move in the right direction as they start to date and leave us behind. Some people can handle this but so many cannot and it disturbs them terribly to know that the person the literally grew up with has now left them behind.
It’s a form of rejection that we are not prepared for and we never thought we would feel this way when we were enjoying the new person in our lives. It never crossed our minds that we would actually feel somewhat angry and envious at the same time.
We fooled ourselves and thought that the person we left home for would keep life fun and carefree. What do we find??? We find someone who wants to get married, raise babies and be the perfect mate.
The truth is they were much to young for us but they were fun and they made us feel desirable. The sex was plentiful and exciting but even sex can fall into a typical and expected way of life.
We no longer want that person in our life but we don’t want to hurt them either. All we want is to meet that one person that is meant for us and us alone. We want to experience akai ito or unmei no akai ito.
We had our romp with the younger woman or man and we realize that they really are not what we are looking for or what we need. We discover that our x is now dating someone their age and we find them to be really happy while we are not.
This is not the way it is supposed to be, we are supposed to be the ones that left for true happiness. We are the ones that are supposed to have found the perfect fit for us but what has happened?
Our x has found the person that they are meant to be with while we are once again in a relationship that does not make us happy. We are once again questioning why we cannot find the happiness we so desperately need.
We have it all, literally have everything we ever wanted except for that one person that is our other half. The one person that is meant to make our world complete and make us whole.
We really need to take a step back and examine where we are heading in our lives and allow that one we think of to come to us. We need to set our fears aside, open our hearts and allow true love to usher into our hearts.
We need to be happy for our x and be wise enough to wish them well as we find ourselves and our true love, the one that will care for us like no one ever has.
He had followed her online for years and he had finally gotten up the nerve to meet her face to face. He pretended to be someone else as he answered a backpage ad she had placed.
He knew she played with other men and he also knew she would never have sex with any of them. They were nothing but toys that she played with and the time she spent with them helped pay the bills and nothing more.
She wasnt the type of woman to hook up with a man and drain his wallet. She wasnt the type of woman who acted as if she was helpless and needy. She was a woman who had experienced many difficult times but she came out the other end a wiser and stronger woman.
He had met her at a local restaurant, nothing fancy or exciting in the least bit. He wanted to wow this woman, he wanted to touch her like no other man ever had. He wanted to really impress her, give her the world and fulfill every dream she ever had.
He wanted to surprise her constantly and he wanted to be able to know her desires and wants, long before she even have a clue that she would be thinking about such things.
He had his EurocopterEC225 Super Puma Mk II+ helicopter ready to whisk her away to New York for dinner. He had his private chef make a lovely dinner starting with salad greens, grape tomatoes, edamame, baby cucumbers, roasted pecans with a balsamic raspberry vinaigrette drizzled lightly on top.
The kobe beef tenderloin was going to be cooked to perfection which meant it would be medium rare served with a side of rice and almond medley. There was going to be chocolate creme brulee desert to finish off the evenings dinner.
He was going to dazzle her with a lovely meal and a series of fine wines to enhance every dish. He was going to hand feed her and touch her lips as often as he could before he finally fucked her.
Yes, he hat every intention of fucking her not falling in love with her but damn this woman had taken control of his heart long ago. At first she was nothing more than another woman, another day, another few hours of distraction.
He owned his own line of clothing and he was going to dress her in his brand, Gabatt. He also had picked out a beautiful Versace outfit for her to wear to dinner along with stocking, bra, garter, panties and high heels. He just hoped he wasn’t being to presumptuous.
He had set the appointment with her to meet him at the bar in his hotel as he knew it was disrespectful to have her come to his room. They had several glasses of wine and he asked her if she would care to join him for dinner.
She said she wasn’t dressed for dinner and he said he had assumed that she may not be dressed. He told her he had purchased some clothing in her size in case she did accept his dinner invitation.
She agreed to dinner and he took her to his room and gave her the clothing and told her to meet him in the bar when she had changed. He so wanted to stay and help her get dressed but it was too early to make such a move.
She removed her clothing and walked naked into the bedroom and she put on the garter, bra, panties and she slowly slipped her foot into the stocking and used both hands to bring it to her garter. She did the same with the other stocking and then slipped her feet into the shoes.
He had even picked out the top ten perfumes for women and she smelled each one until she finally decided on the Clive Christian No. 1 eau de parfum which was only $15oo.oo a bottle for a 1.7 oz bottle.
He waited inpatiently for her to meet him and he kept looking towards the elevator for her to exit. The door opened and she departed as soon as the doors opened. She walked towards him and he could feel her power, her presence screamed “I am in control” and she was a beautiful woman who just had the ability to take him to places he had never been and he knew it.
They departed hand in hand and they ended up on the roof and he lead her to his helicopter. He helped her get into the seat and he made sure that her seat belt was firmly in place. He walked around and entered the captain’s chair and he was going to fly them to New York.
She was slightly impressed with his ability to fly such an awesome aircraft but she was only slightly impressed and he knew it. They chatted about everything from farm animals to big business and before they knew it they had reached the roof of his building.
He landed the air craft with the skill of a well-trained pilot and as soon as they touched down he undid his seat belt and removed his headset and opened the door. He walked around and opened her door and removed her seat belt and helped her depart.
He took her by the hand and helped her out of the helicopter, taking her by the hand he lead her to the elevator that led to his penthouse. He asked her to sit down on his $8000.00 dollar Chesterfield Leather Sofa.
His personal butler Charles had the salads already prepared and waiting on the Chinese Rose Wood Flower Carving Round Dinning Table. Being the gentleman he was he pulled out her chair and once seated he pushed her up to the table.
He sat down and they began to eat their salads as they chatted about her childhood. He was interested in how she had grown up and what was important to her. He knew that family was paramount in her life as in his and he knew this woman was his alter ego, his better half, his soul mate.
They finished their salads and as she sat down her fork Charles immediately removed the fork and plate that has been refrigerated before being served. He removed his bosses plate as well and immediately replaced the cold plates with hot plates of beautifully cooked beef tenderloin and a rice medley.
The steak was so tender she cut it with a butter knife and the rice medley was quite delicious as well. Unable to eat very much of her meal she almost felt guilty to let such a wonderful meal mostly go to waste.
Removing her plate and silverware Charles asked if they would like desert and both had no desire for anymore food. Both were starving for conversation, for the connection of a lifetime, for the time that expressing their sensual side would come.
They sat side by side on his sofa and continued to chat until he could no longer hold back and he had to kiss her not once, not twice but so many times as their lips appeared to become one.
Her hand touched the side of his neck and the moistness between her legs became more than moistness as she was actually quite wet from his touch. He unbuttoned her shirt and slid it off her shoulders and it landed on the back of his couch.
he kissed her neck and down her cleavage as he felt her breast with both hands. He slipped his hands around her back and unhooked her bra releasing her breast. Her nipples cried out for his lips and tongue and he teased each one unmercifully.
He carried her to his bedroom and laid her down on his bed, slowly removing her skirt and panties, he spread her legs and kissed the inside of each leg as he worked his way to her womanly parts.
He kissed and sucked on her labia’s then worked his way to her clit as he kissed and tugged on it until she literally rose off the bed from the orgasm. He had made her squirt for the first time in her life and she so enjoyed the release.
She felt so good and she wanted him to feel as good as she was at that very moment. She asked him where his ties were and he pointed to his closet. She pushed the button that electronically brought out the rack of ties and she chose three.
She walked back to the bed and tied each wrist to the head of his bed then she covered his eyes with the third tie. She kissed him hard on the lips and then she kissed his neck, chest, abdomen and then she teased his cock.
She took the head of his cock slowly into her mouth and teased the underside as she massaged his balls. She took him deeper and deeper into the warmth of her mouth and she stroked his cock with just the right amount of pressure.
She could feel his cock getting ready to shoot its wad and she abruptly stopped. She walked to the kitchen and grabbed a bowl and filled it with ice. She returned to the bedroom and slipped some ice into her mouth.
She lowered her body between his legs and took his cock into her cold mouth and the shock to his cock made him go limp. She was doing tease and denial to him and he was loving it.
She rubbed her wetness on his cock and moved back and forth dry fucking him which really turned him on. His cock had turned purple with desire and she finally slipped on a hollow strapon onto his cock.
She removed the tie from his eyes and he watched her sit down on his cock which was encompassed with the hollow strapon. He could watch her fuck him but he couldn’t feel her and this was making him insane.
As she began to orgasm, he did as well and not feeling her really fucked with his mind. He had never had an orgasm without feeling his hand, a womans vagina or mouth and this was such a foreign feeling.
She removed herself from him and she walked into the bathroom and ran the water until it was hot. Soaking the wash cloth in the hot water she thought of how he would feel inside of her as he came.
She walked back to him and removed the hollow strapon and wiped him clean with the warm cloth. He was so turned on by her consideration and he couldn’t wait to actually be inside of her when he came.
They laid side by side and chatted until both of them fell into a slumber. He ended up spooning with her and holding her close. He felt like he was holding his childhood teddy bear which gave him so much comfort as a young boy.
This is how it was supposed to be, this was how it was supposed to feel when you were with that one person meant just for you. This is what a soul mate was and the feeling that came being with them was indescribable but so satisfying and undeniable.
Did you ever feel like taking a knife and forcing through your abdomen as if you needed to feel the immense pain? I wish I had the strength or weakness to do just that. Im not sure if it takes strength or does one need to be so weak to end their suffering?
Im tired of living alone and spending my days alone and my nights run into the next day and back into night. Im just feeling so empty, so sad, so broken and damaged. I have so much to give the right person but he doesn’t doesn’t seem to want to come out of hiding.
Im not suicidal, I just want the emptiness and loneliness to end and I just want to laugh and smile and walk hand in hand in the rain. I dont feel worthy or someone who deserves to be loved.
I feel like the little kid who runs and hides under his bed because he is afraid of what is coming for him. I feel the black hand of doom shadowing over me wanting to see me suffer and in pain.
I have been thinking about my husband this past week as it has been four years since he passed away. I was never in love with him or him with me. Together we forged a really good friendship and I think that is why we rarely if ever fought or disagreed. I was thinking of the day I found out he was dying and I realized he wasn’t even aware that his life was almost over.
We were going through a divorce and he had been seeing the dr. and she had told him he was with leukemia and he had the worse type. When I visited him in the hospital the dr. walked in and introduced herself to me and she told me how sick my husband was. I looked at her with shock and asked her how long he had.
She looked at me and then him and I could tell by the pleading in her eyes that she didn’t want either of us to ask that question that a dr. hates to answer. My husband asked her how long? A year? Six months? and the dr. said one month. I was floored, the wind knocked out of me with a baseball bat, reality became to real for me at that moment.
The dr. walked out of the room and I sat down on the hospital bed next to my husband. I looked into his eyes and I could no longer control myself, I could no longer hold back the tears. I bent over and put my head in his lap and I cried, yes I cried like a baby as I didnt want him to die.
My attorney and I had talked and said if he died it would make things so much easier and yes most of us going through an ugly break up at one time or another which our significant other would die. How many people actually are faced with such a thing happening?
Looking back I guess my luck has always been bad and yes if it could go wrong it always did in my life. I can honestly say I have never felt guilty for wanting him to die because it is very common for people to feel the way I did in the situation we were in at that time.
Did I want him to die? No, I was angry and he had made my life a living hell. Does that justify me wanting him dead, no it doesnt but I am human and being so makes me fallible and say and do things that are regrettable. I do miss my husband as he and I grew together and experienced so much together.
We grew as individuals as well as a couple and it is hard to walk away from that regardless how angry two people are at each other. There are days I miss him terribly but I have to admit that I am happier without him in my life and I know the man I am meant to be with is walking closer to me every day.
The 26th of April was the four year anniversary of my husband’s demise. It doesn’t matter how our relationships end they always affect us the same way. We go through the grieving process and no it isnt easy.
I lost my husband to physical death but so many loose their relationships to divorce which is another form of demise except the person is living. I woke up and mechanically I walked to my sliding glass door and peered out.
I looked out over the field of green and the haze hung dangerously low to the ground. I felt a tear roll down my cheek as I felt so lost, so defeated and so let down. A marriage is meant to last or so that is what I had thought. We share so much with that one person, so many firsts.
The pain lingers for way to long as every holiday or anniversary settles within us and yanks at our heart. Even though we may be happier apart from our other half there is so much sadness that follows us.
We need to learn to forgive each other as well as forgive ourselves because when the anger subsides the truth emerges. We must accept that we once loved that person very much and they were our everything.
When the dust settles and we are finally unhinged from our partner permanently we need to look toward our future. We need to learn to move on by ourselves, no one to care for us when we are hurting, when we are ill, when we need someone to listen.
So many say we should be happy when the divorce is finally over and we are free but it doesn’t work that way. We feel a tremendous loss, tremendous sadness as a part of our life is over and a part of us lost forever.
We realize that we shared so many important days of our lives with that person and it hurts to know that we will do that no more. We may be dating someone younger and we enjoyed the spontaneity of the relationship especially the sex.
The reality hits us that we are not happy with someone so much younger than we are and we do not want to continue living our own inflicted lie. We want a relationship with someone more our age, someone actually more like our ex.
We feel the need to live out our dream with someone closer to our age and maturity and we realize that we are getting older. We need to go after our dreams and live out our golden years with that one special person that waits in the wings for us, our dream mate, our soulmate.
The wonder years to me is every year of my life as I wonder what is yet to come. What am I yet to experience, to share with others, to learn. Life hasn’t been very good to me but I have learned much from the lessons thrown my way.
Those that I have loved have been taken away from me so early in my life. I feel cheated in so many ways but everything that happens to us is another stepping stone taking us closer to where we truly belong.
I could easily sit back and feel sorry for myself and want others to pity me but that isn’t going to make me happy or make my life better. Some thing money will make their lives complete, some think fame is the answer.
My wonder years have taught me that neither fame nor fortune comforts us when we need it the most. We will never feel whole and complete if we are relying on the lottery to give us what we need.
I continue to go through each year wondering if this will be the year that brings me completeness. If this will be the year that I meet up with my soul mate and my life finally feels complete.
I have gone through so many changes in the last four years and tomorrow is the four-year anniversary of my husband’s demise. If you lose a partner through death or divorce the day they exited your life is never one to be forgotten.
I know my daughter will feel her dad’s loss but I don’t know if my son will be aware that it is the four-year anniversary. I have grown leaps and bounds but the road has not been one of ease.
I have not welcomed a man into my bed in the last four years because I haven’t found a man who grabs my interest. There hasn’t been a man who has stood in front of me that I felt the desire to drop my panties for.
It will take a pretty special man to get close to me, to touch me emotionally as well as physically. When I finally do make that move he is going to someone who will be getting the best that I have to give.
I stayed in a marriage not out of love but out of commitment to my children and I did all the things a vanilla mother was expected to do. My children went to Catholic school and I was the mother that was involved with school.
I worked full time, cooked dinner for the family, did homework with my children and gave them baths and hugs every night. Was I happy? No, I was not but I stayed as I wanted my children to have something I never had, a mom and a dad that loved them.
Some of us are very spiritual and we have the ability to know things that others do not. I am one of those people, I know there is a soulmate for me and I know he knows that he is for me. He questions himself way to much and he does what is expected of him.
Like me, he lives for others and their happiness is in the forefront of his life. He must accept himself for who he is and what he wants. He will never be happy until he accepts himself for who he is and when he is true to himself he will find his life will be so enriched and filled with happiness.
We must stop living a lie and live the life that is ours and ours alone. We must walk away from what doesn’t serve us and walk into what does. We need to accept ourselves for who and what we are and then we will find true happiness that will take us to our final years with that one person we have waited for our entire lives.
Today was interesting as I had a play partner that enjoyed cbt but couldn’t handle having his ass spanked with a paddle. I think it was because he was so skinny and had such a small ass and that made him so sensitive. He enjoyed being flogged and even enjoyed having me slap his balls from behind with the flogger as I ordered him to spread his legs as far apart as he could. I used long glue sticks on his back and ass as well as paddles.
I had him remove his clothing except for his sox as the tile floor is cold and I wanted him to be comfortable, my basement is finished and quite nice and the air was warm enough to make anyone feel cozy. I put my fur-lined handcuffs on each of his wrists and then I hooked each one to the eye screws in the ceiling and I chatted with him to get him to relax as I walked over to the table.
I picked up the blindfold and walked behind him and placed it over his head and covered his eyes. The excitement was obvious in his erect manhood and I could tell he hadn’t been laid in a very long time. I began to flog his back and down over his ass and down each leg and I ordered him to spread his legs as far apart as possible. He was very willing to do what I ordered and I rewarded him with bringing the flogger up between his legs slapping his balls and cock.
After a good flogging I moved onto a paddle and paddled his ass several times but it was apparent that he did not enjoy the paddling so I moved on to a leathe belt and gave him a few good cracks on the ass. I moved onto a smaller paddle and he didnt seem to enjoy that either so I used my feathers on him as feathers are so soft and made him relax. He liked a good flogging and then the feathers and his skin developed goose bumps as I went over every inch of his body.
He was a guy that liked toys that involved insertion into the bodies oral cavities but I made it clear that I do not do that as that is crossing a line. I do not do anything sexual with those that I play as it crosses the legal lines as well as dilutes the relationship. If I am involved with someone then and only then will I involve sex as that is something so sacred and special to me and I want it to be something I share with just one special person.
I could see he was enjoying himself immensely as there was a small puddle of pre cum on the floor in front of him which made me decide to try the tens unit. I picked up the tens unit case and removed it and asked him how he felt about trying it. He was open to trying it which made me spread his ass cheeks and apply one electrode next to his asshole and the other electrode next to his cock.
I turned it on and his asshole danced like it was in a competition, lol and he tried his best to get away from it but he couldn’t do to the handcuffs. He begged me to remove the electrodes and I did as he requested. I took it down a notch and put miniature clothes pins all over his cock and I ordered him not to cum or I would tens unit his ass again. He once again begged to have the clothes pins removed and I did.
I went over his body once again with my fluffy boa and the feathers and that was extremely enjoyable to him and I unhooked each hand from the ceiling and removed the cuffs from him. His time with me was up and I told him it was time for him to get dressed that our session had come to an end. He was quite happy and wanted to meet again but I told him to go home and go over the session in his mind and think about what else he would like to try.
The first thing that goes in a relationship is not the sex, no its something so intimate, so desirable and so required for a solid connection of two people. What would you think it is?
Hand holding? Nope, it is kissing and sharing a kiss is actually the first break in any relationship. When you no longer want to kiss the person of your affection you are essentially saying that you have lost interest in that person.
I constantly hear people complain about the lack of sex in their relationship but I never hear anyone complain about the lack of kissing. To me kissing is so important as it makes me feel romantic and when I kiss someone more than once, like making out I get physically excited.
If you think about it your first intimate moment with the opposite sex or even the same-sex if you are gay includes kissing. I love to kiss and when I kiss I generally touch the persons face as I kiss them.
There is something so romantic and sexy about touching the persons face and letting your hand slide down the side of their face and down their neck. There is something so exciting about touching the neck as it makes me think of their bare chest.
Once I start thinking of the bare chest I think of that person’s body and touching them in their entirety. I don’t know if I am the only one that thinks this way but I do get excited when my lips meet another.
If you only have sex without kissing then you have no relationship with that person. They are nothing but a piece of ass to you and you really lack the respect you should have for that person.
If you date someone and spend quite some time just kissing that says so much about you as a person. Anyone can kiss and fuck but how many will just kiss and not try to take it to the next level on the first or second date?
Kissing is so under rated and so many don’t even realize that they no longer kiss their mate on a regular basis but they sure notice the lack of sex. If you want to keep sex in your life than you need to keep kissing as kissing is an aphrodisiac that will land you in bed having sex.
No one knows of the ache in my heart
No one sees the tears that I fight
There are no arms reaching out to me
I am all alone, I am just me
I have fooled myself for way to long
Thinking he loved me but
the truth is he is gone
I carry this ache
within my chest
but I am letting go
and looking to be my best
I may not be young
and have a tight ass
but I am smart and
know how to make
a relationship last
I got pregnant at 34 and yes I was on birth control but it didn’t matter. My husband was 45 and he didn’t want anymore children. It was up to me to do what I felt was best for myself and being 34 I was on the cusp of being to old to have children safely.
My husband was twice divorced and had fathered three children but I wasn’t privy to that information. I was only told about one marriage and two daughters and of course the youngest daughter came to live with us and threw it in my face about the son I didn’t know about.
My husband was no disciplinarian and he wanted me to discipline his daughter which was plain bullshit. This caused so much friction and problems and I told him he had to be a father to his daughter.
Things got so bad she ended up moving back with her mother and I was so thankful because the x-wife was a total pain in the ass. She was really pissed he had remarried and the girls wanted their parents to get back together of course.
My husband didn’t want to father anymore children but he also saw the advantage of me having his kid and marrying me. He saw the material shit I had and since he lost everything in his divorce I would be a great catch.
I had so much going for me and he wanted to sink his greedy fucking teeth into what I had. We married and I gave birth to my daughter and he fell in love with her. a little over a year later I practically had to tie him down to get me pregnant as he didn’t want to have sex.
There was no love between us but I was bound and determined not to raise a child without a sibling. I finally got pregnant and gave birth to my son and my husband had no interest in him what so ever.
My husband was at the age that his work was his world and he wanted to go to work and get the respect from the men that worked for him. He didn’t want to play the daddy with the kids and he didn’t want to change diapers.
Looking back the worse thing that could have happened is that I got pregnant because men don’t want to be fathers to a new family. Men want to raise their family and move on into another phase of their lives.
They don’t want the young, pregnant wife and they don’t want to start over with another family. They are happy to raise their kids and once that is done they want to do all of the things that they couldn’t as a young father.
Men don’t want to do three a.m. feedings and diaper changes, they don’t want to listen to a crying baby and they don’t want to alter their lives to accommodate a young child again.
I’m glad I have my children but I wish they had a different father because my husband didn’t want to be a father again. He didn’t want to be bothered with raising another family and the worse thing any woman can do is expect a man to want another family.
Some men think they are ok with having another family but when the baby comes and the crying begins they start wishing they had made a different decision. If you are a man dating a much younger woman be very careful as she will do everything possible to get knocked up.
She will lie to you and say she is happy just dating you but the truth is she is hoping to get pregnant every time she spreads her legs. She will “forget” to take her birth control and she is secretly hoping that she will accept your seed as her own.
Yes, it is sad but true young women will do what they have to get a man to marry them. They will lie and say whatever they have to so they can get your child within their body.
Once they are pregnant with your child then they expect you to marry them. This isn’t the 50’s and men no longer feel the need to marry a girl who is pregnant. Men no longer have to live in shame if they chose not to marry the girl who is with their child.
A smart man will not let a young woman get to close and begin to think that marriage is around the corner. A smart man will not let any woman trap them in a situation that they don’t want to be with for the rest of their lives.
I have always been different from the other females in my life. I have always been very open and up front and I have always been honest. I also have always hidden the freak in me until I got older, like in my twenties.
I have always been a freak between the sheets as I have always experimented sexually. I have always been the type of woman who wanted to try something new as I never wanted my sex life to get boring.
I was never a woman who wanted the plain, vanilla boring sex life as I knew that my husband or significant other would want something new and unusual eventually. It’s important to keep your sex life fresh and new and to be open to what others consider kinky.
There is nothing kinky about trying new things sexually but so many seem to think anything that isn’t missionary is kinky. I don’t care if I am labeled a freak between the sheets because the one thing I never have had is a boring sex life because of me.
My husband always thought I was weird and unusual but he could never complain that I was boring sexually, in fact it was the opposite as he was boring as fuck, yes he was a boring fuck.
The most exploration he would do sexually is to fuck me on all fours. I got so bored I could have read a paragraph of any book before he was finished. He was a cum and go to sleep type of guy and I never want another boring sexual relationship like that again.
I havent had sex in like six years because I refuse to fuck anyone just to get off but I am getting to the point that I am just about ready to ride anyone that would stay still long enough to let me get on.
It’s so damn hard not to have sex with someone, anyone but I have these morals and ethics that control me and I am sure they have saved me from some nasty diseases. You have to be so careful in today’s world as people just do not care and will share their sexual diseases without so much as a blink of the eye.
There is nothing like a wonderful sexual relationship and without it you have nothing. When the sex dries up in the bedroom the relationship begins to head south and that is not a good thing.
I’m waiting for the freak in the sheets in the form of a male that will keep me happy between the sheets as well as out of them. I’m waiting for Mr. Right to make me laugh and make me feel happy again.
I’m reaching the end of the semester at school and I am so looking forward to being done with my classes. The only class I am really enjoying is my spanish class because my instructor is so awesome.
She really cares and wants her students to understand not only the language but the lifestyle of Latinos. I made her tres leches cake for her birthday and she took some home to her esposo. He really enjoyed it and told her he wished she had brought more home.
I so enjoy feeding people so of course that really stroked my ego. Latinos are big on family and familia is numero uno in their eyes. Tengo no familia except my two children so holidays are especially lonely.
I know I have a soulmate out there somewhere and I have waited for so very long to meet him. It’s been a long, lonely road that I have walked and its time to experience some happiness.
I cannot wait to meet the one that will fill the emptiness in my heart, the one that I can tell all of my secrets to, the one I can trust and share my life with. I cannot wait to be with that one person that I can share my body mind and soul with.
I think the reason I have been alone so long is for me to learn, to learn how to maneuver difficult times in my life, learn to grow and make smart decisions, learn to do the right thing and just to learn period.
I wish God would realize that I have learned and yes I have suffered while learning. I am a better person today than I was yesterday and I will be even better tomorrow. I do hope my children have learned from watching me as I grow and make mistakes.
My children want to see me happy and they want the right man to come into my life and make me smile. They want to see me be giddy and happy, they want nothing but my happiness.
My daughter will be leaving me in January for four months to go to Washington D.C. and work under an attorney. My son, well I have no idea what he plans on doing other than he talks a good talk.
He needs to be out on his own and grow up, he needs to mature and to learn how to care for himself. As any mother I care for my children so much and I worry about them and pray that life treats them better than it has treated me.
Have you ever relied on one person to get you through the difficult times in your life? Did you ever want that person to be part of your life even though you had never met them? Did you ever feel a connection with an unknown person yet the pull to know more about that person constantly drove you to find out about that person as much as possible?
Did you ever feel all alone and then read something that was written by the person you had never met and you felt that they understood what you were going through? As you read what they had written word for word you felt as if this person was living your life as you felt they knew exactly what you had been experiencing. Did you ever feel as if that person had been walking in your shoes?
As I write my life experiences and I let go of so much stress and pain I feel as if others have lived the same life that I have. They have experienced the pain and anger, the loss and let downs, the twists and turns that life throws at all of us. Have you ever felt that there is another person in this world that totally gets you? Totally relates to you and has the same wants and needs as you do?
That was me at one time as I felt that I had a connection with someone who had lived a completely different life than I had. I felt he understood me and what I had been experiencing in my life. I felt he was now going through the field of mud that I had once walked through.
I had been led to believe that this person was someone who was very famous and he had left his mark on the world of sports. For years I literally thought this man followed me and would one day meet me. The truth is I had been mislead for over six years and the man who reads everything I write and follows me online is not famous at all.
He is not the man I had thought and I’m glad I finally know the truth as I can let go of my false dreams and hopes. I so wanted to be with this man for years as he was the only one I felt understood my pain. I also felt that he actually cared about me and what happened in my life.
The truth is I have no idea who is following me online and who has the same fantasies as I do. I do not know this man and probably never will meet him. I know longer wait to meet this man and I no longer believe he is someone very well-known. It never made sense to me why someone famous would bother with someone like me but he became my life line over the years. People are people and all of us are attracted to a certain type of individual.
We are not attracted to someone because they are rich or famous, we are attracted to them first by appearance generally and then the mental connection we build with that person. I think all of us want nothing more than to connect with someone and to love and be loved.
I think all of want someone who understands us, that we can share our fears, hopes and dreams with. All of us want to be happy and all of us want to be able to confide and trust in another. I believe that all of us will find that person that is right for us, yes all in good time I will have the love I need as you will as well.
There is nothing worse than living with constant pain and you can do nothing about it. I have lived in constant pain for many years and I have lived on pain killers for way to long.
I started smoking weed to help with the pain but the side affects are not worth it to me. I quit smoking cigarettes almost a year ago and smoking weed makes me want to have a cigarette so I quit smoking weed as well.
The pain is almost unbearable at times as I have two herniated discs in my lower back, bursitis in my right hip and arthritis throughout my body. I am not one to complain about much to anyone and I hate to be pitied by anyone as well.
If you do not live with pain you have no idea how it can make you want to literally shoot yourself at times. I wake up to pain and many a day I am awoken by the pain and the throbbing.
My son suffers from migraines and I did as well as a kid and that is extremely painful. I know exactly what to do to make him relax enough to fall asleep which seems to help with the pain most of the time.
I lay behind my son and put my hand on his forehead and talk softly to him. This seems to always relax him enough to get him to fall asleep and make the headache disappear.
I have found a hot bath always helps with my pain but one cannot live in a bathtub. The pain comes and goes but the weather does play a major part in it. When it rains the pain is always so much worse.
I was lying in bed last night and my room was lit up by the full moon, I stared out the window and looked at the moon and wondered when is my time to be really happy? When is it my time to laugh and play like the child I once was? I felt so alone and so lost as I have no one I can roll over and hug, no one I can let my tears fall upon and no one that cares if I am here tomorrow or not.
It’s a terrible feeling when you are consumed by loneliness and you wonder what is it going to take to bring happiness back into an empty life. Im so tired of being alone and I am so tired of being required to have all of the answers. I want sex, I want mad passionate love, I want to share my body, mind and soul with someone who appreciates what I have to offer. I could get laid with no problem at all but I want more than a stiff dick and a quick orgasm.
I don’t know if a man would even appreciate the fact that I haven’t been physical with another man in over six years. I do not know if they would care at all or if they would think there was something wrong with me. I cannot tell you how much I miss sex, how much I miss love, how much I miss sharing my life with another but if you are alone than you can appreciate how I feel.
I used to believe that someone out there would appreciate someone like myself but I do not know if that is true any longer. I do not know if there is anyone out there that would want to be with me on any level, may it be just mental or just physical or both. Im feeling pretty down as I am so tired of treading water and life being nothing but an uphill battle constantly and I am just so damn lonely and I hate it.
As adults we are expected to have all of the answers and to know what direction our lives are headed in. The truth is no one has all of the answers and not everyone knows where they are headed.
I am one that is trying to find herself, find out what I really want out of life, how I want to live until I die and if I want to share my life with anyone. I am one that likes her freedom to do as she pleases which isnt saying much as I am quite settled.
I am very old school and I am quite happy literally watching the grass grow and being the homebody. I love to travel and to learn about different lifestyles but it doesnt make me crazy to stay home.
I have no desire to date younger men and no a younger man doesnt make me feel young and desirable. I know what the younger set sees in the older set as they see money, stability and someone to take care of them.
I have learned to accept myself for the person I am and I do not need someone to blow smoke up my ass and tell me how great I am. I have several men in my life that think I am the greatest thing since sliced white bread.
I am a caring individual and I listen to those around me and the key to listening is to listen to what is not said. People talk and say nothing but if you listen closely you will hear what is hidden in their hearts.
I have learned that we must go after what we truly want as there is no guarantee of tomorrow. If you want to meet someone then make it happen, if you want to befriend someone then do it, if you want to end a relationship then do it and move on.
I have learned that happiness is so damn rare and we must grab it while we can and not let guilt rule our lives. We cannot live for someone elses happiness and we cannot be there for someone we really rather not be there for.
Most people know that they are loved or have been loved by someone special in their lives. I am not talking about love from your parents or relatives, not your kids or your pets.
I am talking about the love that comes from a relationship with that one special person that you have carried within your heart for years. In my opinion it isn’t possible to fall in love with someone in several months but there are those that have done just that.
People take love and mistaken it for something it isn’t and some people get so caught up in the moment they think they are in love. Some people become obsessed with another and think that is love as well.
When you love someone you want to be with them, you want to help them, you want to listen to them, hold them, kiss them, make them smile, make them laugh. You do not sit in the background and become a spectator to their lives.
If you really love someone you will do what ever you must to be with that person and you do not use others to be a substitute for that one your heart yearns for. You step up and let that person know you want to know them, be their friend and you build a relationship with the person.
I have so many men that want to be in a relationship with me and I do not wish that as there is only one that holds my heart. He hides behind la computadora and he fucks a much younger woman.
He isn’t happy even though he has moments that do make him smile and sometimes laugh. I am not waiting for him but I am obviously waiting for someone who will make my heart skip a beat, make me long with physical desire for that person.
The one I think about often is from Argentina and he has three sisters, one of which he is especially close to. She, like myself is a Scorpio and I can tell you that she is very traditional in many ways.
She loves her brother and wants him to be happy but she doesn’t agree with some things that he has done. No one agrees with us totally and when a close sibling doesn’t support us it hurts us as it feels like a betrayal at times.
I would so enjoy meeting this sister as I do believe we would get on famously. He has such a great relationship with this sister and I am so glad for him. I have one sibling alive that is the devils spawn and it hurts not be able to confide in her.
We always want our siblings to approve of those that we date and marry but I can tell you Gabriella does not approve of her brother dating anyone much younger. I am sure she would let him know but she would probably be very cautious at voicing her opinion.
We would get on famously as we have the same beliefs, morals and we are true to ourselves. I would never want to meet her unless he was divorced and we had been dating for several months.
I would love to go out with him and just be friends, get to know each other and see how we mesh as individuals. I would never have sex with him until he was closer to the end of his divorce.
Will we ever meet? I do not know but I do know that I am not waiting for him and am spending time with some pretty special men. Sexually, I am saving that part of me for a relationship that is sound and filled with love.
Last night a friend and I went to a party, yes the kind that you beat or get beaten at. I ended up playing with Petchard from Fetlife as he is a local that attends the parties. He was in Bosnia and they captured him and attempted to force him to give information.
They cut off his toes on his left foot one by one and then cauterised the open wound of each removed toe. He woke up three days later in an American hospital and he has enjoyed serious pain since that time.
He has a polyamorous relationship with DutchessEve and out of respect for her I requested to play with Petchard. He looked bored as hell so I asked him if he would be interested in playing. He jumped at the opportunity like a bum after a free lunch.
The Dutchess had brought her bag of toys which was quite a nice selection and she allowed me to use her toys. I do not like to use my toys on people I do not know or have never played with.
I started with the floggers and moved on to the leather spanking paddles, a few acrylic paddles, whips and wooden paddles. I was limited to the use of my right arm as I have somehow injured my left upper arm and cannot really use that arm.
I have been in so much pain to the point that I have had to take a break from swimming for two days at a time. I swim an hour and walk an hour but the pain has kept me from exercising at all.
Anyway, I was able to leave Petchard with some pretty handsome bruises and I also broke skin in several spots. This surprised me as it wasn’t my intention to bring forth blood.
As I was playing I thought about my sister and how she has treated me and I thought about karma and how karma will rear its ugly head and teach my hateful sister a lesson. I have decided not to let myself be controlled by anger or hate and just let a higher power teach others the lessons they need to learn.
Just because I am limited to one hand doesn’t mean that I cannot give a good thrashing. As you can see by the above pictures I gave the best I could under the circumstances and he really enjoyed himself, now that is all that matters isn’t it?
They had made an arrangement that worked rather well for both of them. They played and then they slept together but she never had sex with him. She was the domme’ and he was one of her subs and he followed her every direction.
They spooned but that was a s far as things went physically between them. He had asked her once if she didn’t like sex and she laughed so hard that tears ran down her cheeks. She explained to him that she adored sex but refused to fuck someone just for the sake of getting off.
She had told him she was waiting for that special person that was her soulmate. She knew one day that the man who was meant to be with her would be and then and only then would she allow herself the pleasure of a mans body inside her once again.
This woman never seized to amaze him as she could accomplish anything she set her mind to. She had a will of titanium and she was head strong for sure. No one could make her do a damn thing she didn’t want to and she would never be a push over for anyone.
She showed him a kindness when others laughed at him as he had a physical deformaty that made so many shun him. Not her, she took him under her wing and had shown him what love was.
She had given him so much of her time and she listened intently when he needed to unload his mental garbage. She never made him feel small and worthless as so many women had. She always encouraged him to reach for the stars and go after his dreams.
He had a damn good paying career and so many women tried to get with him and empty his pockets. They wanted so much from him except himself and this had made him almost hate women in some respect.
They didn’t give a shit about him but what he could give them and it had been so obvious to him. Women were users and wanted someone to support them and give them kids. He had one woman try to trap him by getting pregnant but he knew it wasn’t his kid.
He was always so safe and always wore condoms and when done he flushed them. His domme had told him to never throw a used condom in the trash but to flush it so no woman could get his sperm and insert it into herself.
She had taught him so much as she told him what to look for in a woman’s body language, what to listen for and to read between the lines. She told him what he should expect in bed with a woman and what not to expect.
She had been his friend, his mentor and even his personal chef at times. She loved to cook and he enjoyed a good homemade meal and they had shared many meals and nights just talking.
She had confided in him that she did not enjoy inflicting pain on others but did so as they enjoyed it. So many domme’s were taking out their anger in the form of severe spankings and inflicting as much pain as possible.
She was not sadistic but instead she was a sensual domme’. She preferred to bring as much erotic pleasure to a body as she could. She enjoyed watching men squirm in anticipation of what she would do to them next.
She enjoyed tease and denial and the way she did it made a guy cum without her even touching them. She was so damn hot and exciting that the list of men that wanted to spend time with her was quite lengthy.
She never had sex with any of the men she spent time with and so many could not understand how she could never have sex but the men kept coming back to her. Her time was precious and she was very picky with whom she spent her time with.
Everyone needs to play and everyone plays differently, some play card games, some play on the beach, some play board games but I, I play bdsm games with the men that request to experience my brand of play.
I had two eye hooks installed in my basement and they are perfectly distanced for hooking handcuffs to. I had lunch today with a gentleman from Romania and we had a lovely chat.
I made it clear that I never have sex with anyone that I am playing with unless I am involved with that person. We had a discussion of his likes and dislikes and he really gets off on pain as he is a pain slut.
He actually gets really turned on by pain and he gets an erection and he has orgasms which is fine with me. The men that come to me to play like to be naked and handcuffed, they like sensory deprivation, cbt, spankings and the list goes on.
I am very careful when I play as I respect those in my space and never do anything they do not wish to experience. I am also against leaving permanent marks that would have to be explained later.
These men want to experience my brand of fun without their spouses knowing and I never involve myself in their personal lives. They want clothes pins on their balls and they want to feel the sting of a wire hanger.
I admit I have a kinky side but if I met the right guy and he wasn’t into trying anything in the bdsm world I would actually be ok with that. I could easily walk away from anything that didn’t serve both of us.
I may be a domme but I do so enjoy having great sex and enjoying the company of a male that is exciting and fun. I like intelligence and I like someone who can challenge me mentally.
I’m so tired of ignorance and users, liars and thieves and all I want is to meet that one guy that can be my best friend, be my lover, be my motivator and the one that is in my corner cheering me on.
The words “I love you” are used without thought or real meaning by so many people. To tell someone you love them should mean more than a few words and one should never say them unless they truly come from the heart.
I haven’t told anyone that I loved them in so long that I had actually forgotten that the words were in my vocabulary. When I love someone the words mean little if I do not show them through my actions that they own my heart.
You can hack my blog and post that you love me so but the truth is that you do not or you would be with me. Just another person using words out of context as far as I am concerned.
I can not allow anyone to get close to me as I am as fragile as glass inside and have no desire to feel the pain that accompany’s love. True love shouldn’t hurt but it does as we often hurt the ones we love.
If you loved me you wouldn’t be fucking someone else and you wouldn’t keep me guessing as when you will enter my life or if you shall ever enter my life. You love to shock me and confuse me but to do so does not show love it shows control and manipulation at its worse.
You are in such need of real love, real committment, a real woman who cares about you from the inside out. As you know, I would have no trouble burning money to stay warm as I have learned long ago that money should only be used to provide essentials.
You like your fancy lifestyle and you like living large while I on the other hand would be quite happy with a pig farmer as long as he loved me and only me. It’s not about what you have or who the world knows you as.
It’s about loving and being loved and being happy, just a simple kind of happy that comes from the simplest of pleasures. Do you have any idea how many times I have crawled into bed and held onto my pillow as the tears rolled down my cheeks?
Do you have any idea how I have let myself care for you, worry about you, want only the best for you? You want for nothing and can buy any woman you want almost, except me of course you can never buy me as the price tag is way more than what your bank account could ever hold.
I may be a simple muijer but I am not simple-minded and I am not someone to walk all over or take advantage of. Why can’t you just be my pig farmer and we live happily ever after?
I woke up this morning in so much pain as my body is riddled with arthritis and bursitis. Every time it rains the pain is almost off the charts and wakes me up. I moved like a turtle at best on days like today.
It started out raining and then the large snowflakes started to fall. I watched them hit the ground and it was a reminder of different times in my life. Remnants Remnants of few good times hit the cement and shattered like broken glass.
I think back to the times when I lived with my grandmother after my grandfather passed away. We would sit and talk for hours about the farm we used to live on and she taught me so much.
I learned the importance of family and having dinner together, I learned the importance of the earth and gardening, I learned how to love from a place so deep within myself that only a special person could draw it out of me, I learned to trust myself and I learned to be a responsible and respectable human being.
My grandmother was my rock and she kept life secure and stable. When she died I lost part of myself and no I have never gotten that part of me back. Those of us that grew up with grandparents know the importance they played in our lives. My grandmother’s were my everything and taught me so much.
Once again I look out the window and see the big flakes land on the back deck and I watch them melt. It is a reminder of days gone by, never to be relived and a gentle sadness settles into my heart.
My grandmother was big on discipline and she would always get a switch from a tree and that is what I was punished with. Nothing hurts more than a damn switch on the bare legs. Through her discipline I learned respect of others and I do not regret a single thing she did to teach me.
I think back to a time when I found a toad stool and called it a frog bench instead, I remember our cow giving birth to two calves, I remember the tornado that knocked down our barn, I remember the blue streak snake on the porch and I remember the cool summer breeze coming into my bedroom window at night.
I can remember going to sleep feeling safe and secure and never worrying about a damn thing. As an adult there is always something to worry about or someone who relies on me to take care of another issue, another problem.
I would so love to have some time off and just run through a waterfall, ride a horse through a field, sit by a creek and eat a simple lunch. It just seems that life is passing me by and I am nothing more than a spectator.
I so want someone just to take my hand and show me the way, the way to happiness, the way to a carefree day, the way to laughter and love. I just want “him” to show me that life is worth living and yes I will be happy and cared for once again.
How true is his chart? So very true from my perspective
It seems that most of us are programmed to look for a mate very early on in life. We look for that one person that we can pro create with. We look for the one that is going to be a perfect fit for us to raise a family with and to grow with.
We are looking for someone like our mother if we are a man or if we are a woman we look for a man like our father. This is proven through psychology studies but then there are those of us that didn’t have that opposite sex figure to guide us.
We tend to grow up with insecurities that way us down and we tend to easily fall into others view of us. If someone thinks we are unattractive, fat, stupid that sticks with us for our entire lives and we think the same of ourselves.
I have spent most of my adult life in and out of therapy learning how to like myself and ignoring the words that others define me by. It’s been quite a few years that I haven’t cared what others have thought about me or said.
I accept myself for who I am and I do not fool myself by thinking I am someone I am not. I get a lot of attention from younger as well as older men and I know exactly why the younger men want to be with me.
Younger men like a mature woman because we know what we want and we tend to be more secure than the younger woman. He also knows that the older woman isnt with him for his money or station in life, for the most part.
I have found life to be a chain of pain that we continue to add another link to. We fall in love early on and we think that relationship will last forever. It ends up falling apart like an old pair of shredded jeans.
We then find someone who satisfies us sexually and we enjoy all the fucking and sucking that goes on. Then we realize that we will never be sixteen again and the sex just isnt enough to fulfill us.
Instead of thinking about that one new person in our lives in a positive way, they become another burden we do not want to deal with. It all started out as fun and games and then that person wanted more than we were willing to give.
They want a ring on their finger and one through our nose and we refuse to go down that road again. We no longer even want to have sex with that person because in the back of our minds we are wondering how to break it off.
We don’t want to hurt that person but we sure do not want them in our lives permanently either. That is what they want and we knew that long ago but we chose to wear blinders and ignore that.
Yes, we were greedy and self-centered but we also made it clear or so we thought that we were not in the marriage market. What was once fun and exciting is no longer either and we just want out.
We realize that the type of individual we want in our lives is one that is mature and experienced in life. We no longer want to spend time with the one that is young and quite fuckable, in fact we do not even want fuckable any longer.
We want stability, reliability, maturity, security and we want it with someone who compliments us as an adult. We do not want to be someone’s daddy or mommy and we do not want to raise another person, even if we have fucked them.
So how do we let them down gently? How do we get them out of our life without hurting them, too much? We use the words, it’s not you its me and you did nothing wrong, it’s just not the right time in our lives to make it permanent.
We say all the bullshit that makes us take responsibility for the demise of the relationship but it still isn’t going to help heal their broken heart. We have no choice, we must break their heart to fulfill our own with the person we are meant to be with and that person isn’t 15 or 20 yrs younger than we are.
She sat back in the cab and the evening replayed itself over and over in her mind. She felt sick when she thought of him forcing himself upon her and she couldn’t believe a man his age would act in such a manner.
She looked out the window of the cab at the Joe Lewis arm which hung near the river in downtown Detroit. She could see the slabs of ice slowly working their way down the river when her attention was drawn to her phone.
She had received a text from a play partner who wanted to know if she would be interested in a night of play. He was a kinky bastard that enjoyed a good caning and he so loved when she handcuffed him and forced tease and denial upon his body.
He enjoyed it when she ran feathers across his body and he was totally helpless to do anything other than accept the different sensations she subjected him to . He enjoyed fire and ice play and she would get him so aroused but not allow him to touch himself.
This really excited him and turned him on as she kept him blindfolded and at her mercy. She never did anything he didn’t like and he had total trust in her and he never feared that she would do anything to embarrass or hurt him.
He didn’t mind being filmed or photographed as she let him see the video and pictures and he approved every piece of art they had made together. The biggest turn on for him was lying spread eagled and helpless to move as she had chained him to the bed.
She didn’t play with just him which was so much fun as she had brought a third party into the mix. He allowed both of them to play with him and she had ordered Athena to do things to his body that were totally unexpected.
It was so fucking hot to have two women playing with him as he laid there helpless. There was Miss Sanctions who did the ordering and Athena who did what she was told to do.
He had never met anyone that could make a play session so damn exciting and she was worth her weight in gold. She never let him down and she always kept things so damn interesting.
Athena did as she was told and when they were done playing with him Miss Sanctions allowed him to be her partner when playing with Athena. Athena was open to anything and she never said no to any type of play.
Together, Miss Sanctions and he spend an evening of fun and new experiences. Miss Athena enjoyed being at Miss Sanctions mercy and she enjoyed doing the bidding of my domme’.
Athena was ordered to get her ass up in the air and to get on knees and she did as she was told. The straps kept her tied to the bed and she looked forward to getting fucked until she orgasmed over and over.
She so enjoyed getting her ass fucked as well as her pussy and she loved a dildo in her so both holes were filled at the same time. He would fuck her as he had been instructed to do and then he would remove his condom and she would suck his limp cock until he was hard again.
The play last for several hours and when the evening finally came to an end they were exhausted and ready for a good nights sleep. They never slept in the same bed they played in because they always showered and then crawled into bed naked. The clean sheets always felt so good against their exhausted bodies.
Did you ever find yourself attracted to someone but just couldn’t be with them at that particular time in your life? You attempted to forget them any way you could and even went as far as started to date someone else. You knew you had needs that needed to be met and you knew that you just weren’t ready to be with that special one? You knew more about that person than anyone else as you read everything they had written.
You knew by reading their personal blog that they were exposing their deepest feelings and they were sharing the truth that they were living. You read about their fantasies and deepest desires, their fears, their accomplishments, the things that hurt them the most and their greatest disappointments. You knew that person like the back of your hand and you admired them and you ended up desiring them and wanting to share their life with them.
You want to give them the world and make them happy and you want to touch them in every way possible. You want to fuck them but more than that you want to experience what making love with them would be like. You want to feel their touch, taste them and wake up with them next to you, you want to laugh with them and confide in them and you want to share your world with that person.
You knew that one day the two of you would be together but for now you were floating through life attempting to play catch up with years gone by. You met someone much your junior and she made you feel young and desirable again. You enjoy the sex and the laughter the two of you shared but you knew she wasnt a keeper, you knew you would never introduce her to your kids or your favorite sister.
You also knew that you had let the relationship grow beyond the boundaries that you wanted it to and you also knew you were going to have to break the heart of the one you spent time with. You than began to think about ending the relationship but it wasn’t so easy as you had invested yourself into it. You also knew you were not one to hurt anyone deliberately and you thought you had made it clear that the relationship wasn’t going to be permanent.
The two of you fell into something that became comfortable and you knew by the little things they said and did screamed of turning something that was once simple into something much more permanent and complicated. You also knew this is not what you wanted because you knew deep down that the one you were meant to be with was waiting for you to be totally available and that person wanted you to experience the things that you missed in your earlier years.
You also knew that this person wasn’t the run of the mill person and that they were special in a unique way. You also knew that this person was meant just for you and they had something so unlike anyone you had ever met. This special person had the ability to make you think, make you wonder, make you question yourself and some of the things you had done and had felt. This one person was an odd duck but a duck you wanted to be with and you would be with that person one day soon.
As a child I learned early on about the power of control through the use of pain. I was always fearful of the pain that my mother would inflict on me at any given moment if she was not pleased.
I can remember beatings from frying pans, steel brooms, match box car race tracks, wooden spoons or whatever was handy at that time. I remember clearly the bruises and being embarrassed by them and fearing that anyone would ever see them.
No matter how much she beat me I was afraid that I would be thrown into a much worse world if I said anything to anyone else. I also feared that if I said anything to anyone they would say something to my mother and the beatings would be even worse.
As I grew I wondered if knowing what someone enjoyed as much as didn’t enjoy was a way to control them. I found that feeding the enjoyment center of the brain ended up giving me much pleasure as well.
If you know what makes someone pleased and what they do not enjoy you have all the control you will ever need to make both of you happy. Inflicting pain isn’t always the answer as some may think.
Some people actually are convinced that inflicting great amounts of pain gives them power to control the individual. This is not true in many cases the one experiencing the pain uses this against the one inflicting the pain.
You may ask how this could be and the anser is weakness. If the only thing you can do to control me is to physically hurt me then you have no control at all. The mind can actually block the feeling of pain and some actually go into sub space.
I chose to use control through understanding the desires of those in my life. The subs that I have dealt with unknowingly give me all of the power as they tell me what their deepest desires are.
Knowing this I use this to my advantage and take them to a place they have never been. So many subs have dealt with abusive domme’s that are taking out their issues from childhood or bad relationships out on the sub.
This is abuse and it is not bdsm but so many confuse the two. One thing that I am seeing quite a bit of is young girls extremely overweight looking for love in the bdsm world. They end up being pain subs and do not enjoy the pain being inflicted upon them but it gets them the attention they cannot find in the vanilla world.
They haven’t found what they are looking for other than for attention in the negative form. They confuse the top with someone who “loves” them when in fact the top has no love for that person.
Subs out number domme’s 10-1 and it is so easy to find a sub that you can take out your anger on. A weak domme or dom does this and it happens everyday and is just wrong. control is so misunderstood and the use of it is usually done improperly.
To truly control someone you need not inflict physical pain that is not desired by the sub. Even pleasure through materialism is limited and most people find real happiness by feeling desired and they enjoy hearing it and feeling the show of affection through physical means.
The power of touch is extremely desirable and can easily turn tears to smiles. When you are with the person you are meant to be with you always feel happiness. When you are with someone who is only meant to be in your life for a period of time, the newness totally wears off.
When this occurs there is no more fire you feel within your loins, you no longer cannot wait to be with that person and sexually you no longer think of being with that person constantly and making love.
When you find that one person that is meant for you your mind is always wanting to be with them, even after years have passed. The two of you fall into a perfectly fitting mold and you just know you belong together.
Have you ever looked into a mirror and find yourself looking back in wonder? Wondering what happened to you? What happened in your life to make you the person you are today?
Have you ever gazed in and looking back at yourself no longer know who you are or what you may feel? Did you ever look at yourself and see a collage of pieces making a picture of yourself?
It’s as if each piece represents a different year of your life, a different time. Maybe a gentler, more innocent time? Do you wonder if you can ever put those pieces back together again and you once again become whole?
Do you wonder if others can see the damage that you carry within? Do you wonder if you appear to be damaged goods to others? Do you accept the fact that being damaged isn’t so bad after all?
It is true that the damage we have suffered is the exact thing that makes us priceless and beautiful. Never let yourself look at yourself and see a failure, a waste, a human being that should not be. Fill those cracks with the gold from your heart and so many others will see your true value, eventually.
It’s no secret that the first thing that goes in any relationship is the sex. We meet someone and we fuck like rabbits for about six to nine months and then the newness of it all wears off.
When we first start dating someone we go without sleep because we do not want to miss a single moment with that person. We have tons of sex and we get their attention as well.
Everyone likes to feel special and all of us like that giddy feeling that comes with dating someone new. If there is a big age difference then we are really tested over time. The younger the person the more sex they tend to have because it is the natural thing to do.
The older we get we enjoy a lot of sex as well with someone new but the truth is we get tired of fucking like rabbits. We tend to like a more settled type of relationship because we are work oriented.
As we get older we get our self satisfaction from our career and we find it so much more rewarding over time. We want to have someone to come home to that we can talk to, that we can share our lives with. We are not looking for spending our time out and about on the town so much.
As we grow older we need and want someone that we can connect with and no the younger people we meet do not fit the bill. When we leave our marriage or a long term relationship the first thing we do look for is sex.
We are not looking for another spouse, more children or someone to take care of. That is what the younger people we may date want. They are looking for marriage and to have kids or maybe have more kids.
That is definitely not what we want as we get older and we do not realize that the young person we are fucking wants so much more from us. We do not think about the pain we are going to cause the other person when we finally end that relationship.
We do not introduce them to our children or family because we have no intention of keeping them in our lives. They are just a fuck and a good time but they think they can get you to the altar once again.
There is nothing worse than seeing someone and knowing they want to get married and you do not. There is nothing worse than having to break it off with them and see the tears and hear their pleas.
Once you realize that the person you have been fucking isn’t someone you want to be with much longer you start reevaluating the type of person you want in your life. The type of person you truly want to grow old with.
We want someone who is closer to our age and has the same life experiences. We want someone mature and self supportive. We want someone who doesn’t need us as much as want us in their lives.
We like people closer to our age because they can relate to us and they understand the importance of our careers to us. They understand us on so many different levels that someone much younger can never understand.
I think the older we are its important to build a friendship with someone before you crawl into bed with them. There is just something so wonderful about a friendship and maybe it’s because there is no pressure, no expectations. All I can say is be my friend first and lets just laugh and enjoy life and if things progress great and if they don’t well I still have a good friend.
I haven’t had a relationship with my mother in many years but I have been thinking about her for the last several weeks. She had two major strokes several years ago and she was placed in assisted living.
I have the uncanny ability to know things before they happen and I have been having a bad feeling regarding my mother. She passed away the beginning of February and the assisted living only had my home phone number.
I had disconnected my phone sometime ago and only have my cell phone and I just never got around to giving them that number. I had thought about it so many times but it just never seemed that important at the time.
The only family I have left is my sister and my children and that is where the “then there were two” comes into play. I have no extended family anymore and my sister is the devils spawn. I had told her about nine months ago that our mother wasn’t doing good and she needed to take care of the final arrangements.
My grandmother had left money to bury my brother and my sister commingled commingled those funds with her 401K. When my brother died I ended up paying for his cremation because my sister wouldn’t give me the money at the time. She finally did give it back about a year later and the rest of the funds she kept and said she would bury my mother, which she did.
My sister evidently flew to florida and saw my mother before she had her cremated and her ashes scattered over the ocean. Do you think she would have called me? Fuck no she is such a fucking bitch and will need me one day and I will not be there for her. She has done nothing but use everyone in her life and she has never been happy and never will be.
She is a lesbian that treats her lovers like shit and she doesn’t realize that when it comes down to it all she has is me. I am the only one that can make medical decisions for her, possibly give her a kidney or liver if we were a match. I am the only one that can take care of so many things for her as we are related.
She has no compassion yet she works in the medical field, she has no warmth or love to give as she is consumed with anger and hate. She is extremely successful but does that make one happy? Does that keep her warm at night? No and one day she will realize that she should have treated me with love and kindness.
I am glad my mother is finally gone as she had no quality to her life after the strokes and it was so hard for me to see her in a state of such weakness. My mother was the strongest person I have ever known and even though we didn’t have a good relationship I always carried a certain amount of respect for her.
She taught me how to care for myself and never to rely on a man. She taught me the importance of knowing how to do so many things that men do. My mother was a very mentally sick person but I have to admit she did the best she could under the conditions of her life.
You may wonder how I feel about my mother’s passing and all I can say is I feel numb. I don’t know how I feel other than I feel empty and I do not like this feeling one bit. It has taken the my mother’s death to make me accept the fact that she was a very ill woman who had no control over her treatment of others.
This is a sad day for me regardless of the anger I carried all of these years towards my mother and now that she is gone I no longer have a reason to carry such anger towards her. I have tried very hard for years to understand why she did the things she did but it no longer matters, now does it?
This is a time in my life that I so wish I had someone to hold me, someone to listen to me, someone to be there for me. This is the time in my life that I wish I could let someone into my bed to hold my naked body and caress me. This is a time in my life that I really need to have the comfort of a man’s arms around and this is another day that I am all alone and hating it.
Did you ever feel like you had no direction in life and didn’t know what you really wanted or how to get it? Have you ever felt like “today I know what I am doing” and then tomorrow comes and your brain is muddled with uncertainty once again?
Have you felt quite comfortable with the person you are currently dating but know in your heart of hearts that it’s not meant to last? You know that the person just isn’t the perfect fit for you?
You just do not get that all-consuming feeling when it comes to how you feel about them? You also know that they are getting tired of trying to get into your pants without any luck. You also know that if you had sex with that person that is all it would be, just sex.
Do you think about how to end the relationship but just don’t know how to without really hurting the person? You already know that no matter what you say or do you are going to hurt that person and yes it is going to be damn hard to break it off.
You already have someone special that you want to be with but know that they will not take you on until they feel that they have experienced the things that they need to. You just know that there is that special person that you want to be with so bad but you also know that they would offer you nothing more than a free meal and sex as desert.
Why don’t you build a friendship with that person and let things fall as they may? Why do we always look at people as sexual objects and wonder if they can satisfy us sexually? Im guilty of looking at men and wondering how they would please me sexually.
I wonder if they can touch me in a way that can make me want more of their touch and I wonder if they can give me an orgasm when they go down on me. I wonder what they would feel like once inside me and how it would feel to lie next to them after sex.
I am a very physical woman and I know the importance of touch when it comes to sexually arousing someone. I so love to touch the male body and I do it in such a way that the anticipation of what is to come next can drive a man crazy.
I love to have a man lie naked on his stomach and I kiss the inside of their ankles and work my way up to their ass. I love to kiss a man’s ass and his lower back and graze his back with my nipples as I work my way up his back.
I so love kissing and touching and I find it to me so exciting just to make out and touch his body. I love bringing pleasure to a man and that doesn’t mean I am a submissive. Yes, I am submissive to the right man but he is also submissive to me at times.
I know the man who I am meant to be with and yes I am waiting for him to come to me. He will come when the time is right and the time is getting closer every day. You just know when you belong with someone and yes I do belong with that one man even though we have yet to meet.
She was so damn wet she could actually feel her wetness dripping down between her legs and the throbbing in her crotch was making her crazy with sexual desire. She had not met a man who had gotten her this wild with desire since she was a very young girl.
She let him push her back on the couch and they slowly ended up lying on the couch. He had managed to work his way on top of her and she could feel his hardness pressing onto her pelvis.
She couldn’t deny that she wanted to fuck him and she couldn’t deny that having a man inside of her again wouldn’t be just what the doctor ordered. She slipped off her heels and she could hear them hit the floor with a thud.
She could feel his hand working its way down her hip and she had to decide if she was going to let the playtime continue or to stop him. Her mind screamed no while her body screamed even louder yes.
She hadn’t been physical in so long that letting a man between her legs required him to have that something that no other man had. She wasn’t quite sure how to describe it but this man had “it.”
Even though he had the “it” factor as she referred to it as he still wasn’t the man who had been in her dreams for the last six years. He wasn’t the man who kept her going each and every day.
He had been a total gentlemen up to this point but he was starting to exhibit a control that she wasn’t giving into. He wanted to own her, control her, order her about and that had become painfully obvious.
She didn’t mind giving in to him under her conditions but she was in no way going to be his personal whore. She knew he was dating other women and she knew that he had buried his cock in some pretty shady areas.
He was a man who had pussy thrown at him at every turn and no he didn’t mind taking what he wanted from each and every one of them. He knew all he had to do was strike a conversation with any one of them and he would be getting fucked within moments.
His arrogance oozed through each and every pore as he said to her “you want me and you know it”. The words made her skin run instantly cold and she was so turned off she thought she would puke.
Even after telling him no he continued to try to force her legs open with his strong thighs but that only pissed her off. She finally raised one knee rather quickly and she made a nice connection with his cock and balls.
She could hear the wind being knocked out of him and the pain taking over and she didn’t give a fuck. No man would ever rape her again as she was no longer a young nineteen year old that was quite naive.
Her mind took her back to a time that she wanted to forget forever but knew she never would. She could once again feel the pain of the black eye and the painful bruises from the assault.
She had been so young and innocent back then and she had put trust into a blind date. He had taken from her something so near and dear to her and she would never forget that horrific night.
He had taken her innocence and left her with his sperm embedded into one of her eggs. It was bad enough to be taken advantage of but even worse to find that you are with a child that you never wanted.
Here she was on a couch almost reliving a time that she had no desire to remember. Once she knead him he attempted to bury his face in her shoulder and she ended up pushing him off of her onto the floor.
As he laid there crying out in pain he called her everything but a white woman. She put her feet on the floor and stood up, without hesitation she kicked him in the groin once again.
She told him he could shove his fancy lifestyle up his ass and he could go fuck himself as she didn’t need or want anything he had. She was nobody’s fool and he would never again touch her.
She grabbed her coat and walked out on him without a second glance. She knew she would hear from him again because he was so egotistical that he couldn’t let a woman ever get one over on him.
She walked away with a sadness in her heart that brought tears to her eyes. She wondered why she could never meet anyone that was decent, had class and treated her with a respect that was unquestionable.
She walked through the casino looking at the many different faces as some hit jackpots on the roulette wheel and others on the slot machines. She had seen what money can make people do and she wondered what these people where doing to do with their winnings.
Her own sister had been seduced by money which lead her to put her own grandmother in an early grave. Yes, her sister was the devils spawn and she was a heartless bitch who cared for no one and found her happiness through purchasing shit that made her momentarily happy.
Her own mother had practically sold herself to men for a free meal. Her mother wanted a man to support her and take care of her so bad that her kids meant nothing to her. She had even packed up her belongings and headed to Florida to pursue a man when her son turned eighteen.
She pushed open the doors to the outside of the casino and she took a deep breath breathing in the fresh cold air. She felt rejuvenated as she walked briskly to the restaurant to call a cab.
She was not going to allow him to drive her home as he had proven that his worth was worthless. He had acted like some control freak and she was having none of it as his feeble attempt at taking what he wanted from her was a failure. TO BE CONTINUED…….
She was never without the desire to try something new and that included being open to having another female join in the bedroom. She was well aware that most men had the fantasy of two women and she was not above giving a man his fantasy.
She had met him at his casino and they had a lovely dinner of white asparagus poached in a semi sweet wine, new potatoes, a salad of fresh greens, cherry tomatoes, pickling cucumbers, red onions, walnuts and pecans tossed in a balsamic vinigrette and crown pork roast.
The dinner was paired with lovely wines and a sorbet to cleanse ones palette. They had danced to Rod Stewart and he was a fantastic dancer which she appreciated. He had given her a lovely diamond necklace and she thanked him but gave it back to him.
He wasn’t used to a woman giving back such a priceless gift and he found her to be an odd woman. She was wearing a beautiful dress that allowed him the privilege of a bit of a side boob peek.
His hand fell right into place around her waist and they fit so well together as they danced in unison. He felt that she complimented him in every way as she was the perfect dinner partner and she was able to command a table at business dinners as well.
She was what every man wanted in a woman as she could speak on any subject intelligently and at the business dinner she had attended with him she impressed those highly educated that sat at the table.
She knew exactly what to say and when to say it and she had a way of drawing anyone in that spoke to her. The women at the table were all quite bland next to her and every man at the table made a feeble attempt to gain her attention.
She was kind and graceful but she never let him forget that she was with him and him alone. He had several business men ask him if they were serious or just friends and he made it clear that she was off-limits to all of them.
She drank bourbon with the men and smoked a cigar like a pro and when they went to the black jack table she was able to win handsomely. She was kind to the waitresses and respectful to the black jack dealer and she was nothing but class.
She was unlike any other woman he had ever spent time with and he wanted her to be his. He didn’t want to share her with anyone and he wanted to taste every inch of her but she was not so easy as most women where.
He had never had any trouble getting a woman into bed, in fact there had not been a single woman who had been a challenge. A few drinks, a few bucks and off came their clothing.
But this lady, well this lady was not only a challenge for him, she was the challenge of his life. He had tried the flowers and diamonds to get to her but she didn’t falter or give in at all.
He found he could not buy her, flatter her, promise her anything to let him have his way with her. She was so unlike any woman he had ever been with as she was intelligent, warm, kind, demanding in a desirable way, beautiful, intriguing, beyond interesting and he wanted her.
They sat in his private suite and chatted and he slowly moved in for the kiss, the kiss that would lead her into his bed or so he had thought. He placed his hand upon her neck and pulled her close and as soon as their lips met he felt an electrical shock run through his body.
His cock got rock hard instantly and she was a pro at french kissing which so turned him on. She placed her hand on the back of his head and worked her magic playing with his ear lobe.
She kissed him and drew him in close to her and he so enjoyed feeling her nipples against his chest. He loved the feel of her body and not wearing a bra made things so much more exciting for him.
She allowed him the pleasure of unbuttoning her blouse and fondling her boobs and nipples. He kissed her neck and worked his way down her cleavage and to each nipple. She let him suckle her nipples as she sucked in her breath with desire for him to make love to her. TO BE CONTINUED…….